View Full Version : When it rains... (attitude adjustment in circumstances)
So, I've reached the bend. I always rant and rave and let things get under my skin even when I have no control over them. After having a health scare (or two) with stress levels, I've been working really hard on changing my outwards attitude. I think I finally reached a bend in the road... Yesterday morning around 5:30 a.m. my car decided to throw a rod (unknown low oil, no warning lights, etc). In the past, I would've sat there in the car and let the world know what I thought using every expletive known to man and probably some that I've made up, probably beat my hands against the steering wheel, get all riled up and want to kill someone/something, etc.
Well, yesterday my car threw a rod. I calmly call work to let them know I won't be in and need a sub for the day, I calmly call my insurance, I calmly the tow truck, I calmly call the mechanic, I calmly call my wife. I calmly wait for tow truck and wife. I calmly go to mechanic and calmly explain situation. Bottom line, car is dead. I calmly accept the fate. At this point, a new engine would exceed the cost of the car. I just bought a house and therefore truly have NO money to repair the car as we pretty much emptied the savings on the down payment for the house. Anyways, I calmly sit down and calmly think. Then, I calmly get in the wives car and we calmly go to an auto dealer. I calmly explain my situation and ask for options. Not sure how we were able to afford it, but the wife has amazing credit. So, I end up leaving in a used (but very good condition) compact car. I am now a member of the granola family (Honda Fit) and I am calmly taking any criticism for it. I am a major commuter and this morning I was at 37 MPG....
That is all... Breath in, breath out.
"I dun did good". Chest feeling good. No more Mr. WorryWart. First World problems...
*golf clap*
Carry on.
Jeffrey Lebowski
10-22-2014, 08:15
. I always rant and rave and let things get under my skin even when I have no control over them.
Trying to just let go of the things you can't control was advice I was reminded of myself yesterday. It is worth thinking about.
Sorry about the circumstances.
hurley842002
10-22-2014, 08:17
Sorry to hear about your car, I've been there a couple times. Upside is you will likely live longer for remaining calm.
hurley842002
10-22-2014, 08:19
Oh, and you are getting 20MPG more than me lol
StagLefty
10-22-2014, 08:19
Ya did good Bear ! I struggled with the same thing for years. If it's beyond your control so be it.
Granola isn't bad [Coffee]
I will be praying for you. One day at a time. Sometimes it is just one second followed by the next. Fall off, get on, fall off, get on...
Be safe.
newracer
10-22-2014, 08:26
I am surprised you fit in it.
Good for you for trying to not worry about what you cannot control, stress is a killer.
wctriumph
10-22-2014, 08:50
Rule No. One: Don't sweat the little things.
Rule No. Two: Everything is a little thing.
Good luck on the attitude change. I stopped worrying about every little thing and I lost most of my gray hair, turned brown again and, I lost weight too.
Sorry to hear about the car, more money will come, things will get better! And the MPG will help save you some money as well.
I've been through that. My wife's "new to us" Volvo S40 blew its engine around the 5 and a half month mark. I was working on financing the engine replacement around the 6 month mark when the f#$%er at Lompoc Honda that sold it to us sent me an email asking reminding me to bring it in for maintenance. It was already sitting in the back without an engine. Lot of other stresses at that time, and I haven't completely recovered from the nearly $6k price tag on the engine swap even though it was a few years ago.
Sometimes you're the windshield, sometime you're the bug. Life happens, and it sounds like you have figured out that your attitude can either make a situation better or worse. I've been known to toss out an expletive(or dozen) myself, but, like you, I've learned to let most of it roll off my back. If I can't direct it or affect it, I'm gonna try not to let it take me down. Congratulations on your achievement of Zen.[Beer]
Great-Kazoo
10-22-2014, 09:11
Some one, some where, always has it worse than you do.
I am surprised you fit in it.
HA, that's the first thing I said to the chic selling it to me. I looked at her and was like, "Look at me....". HAHA. But it's actually surprisingly roomy on the inside. I can even fit the concert bass drum in the back, which is INCREDIBLE for a compact car.
I've been through that. My wife's "new to us" Volvo S40 blew its engine around the 5 and a half month mark. I was working on financing the engine replacement around the 6 month mark when the f#$%er at Lompoc Honda that sold it to us sent me an email asking reminding me to bring it in for maintenance. It was already sitting in the back without an engine. Lot of other stresses at that time, and I haven't completely recovered from the nearly $6k price tag on the engine swap even though it was a few years ago.
$6K for an engine? Hell no... wow, sorry dude.
Some one, some where, always has it worse than you do.
Amen and Amen, that's what I keep telling myself.
...Congratulations on your achievement of Zen.[Beer]
Yeah, feeling quite accomplished! Didn't even need my BP meds, lol.
$6K for an engine? Hell no... wow, sorry dude.
I think it came to like $5600 fully installed, but it is a Volvo. Sold it before moving here and my wife has an Impreza now.
I told you that home ownership was manning you up. Well done!
sellersm
10-22-2014, 10:59
The late Pastor David Wilkerson, when retelling his famous vision from the 70's, ends with these powerful 5 words that God gave to him: "God has it under control". That's how we live, moment by moment, holding His Hand, step by step... Good for you in remembering this Truth!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buqtdpuZxvk
Congrats. It sounds like you handled it well. Shit happens, that does not mean you have to grab some and throw it. You can just move along.
Wow... you took a bad situation and kept cool. Good on you! Unless you can actually afford whatever you want, no one should really be faulted for driving a car that's within their price range... with the exception of a Prius. Fuck those, they suck. Hope things look up for you Big Bear! Congrats on the new car and keeping your wits about you. [Beer]
TheBelly
10-22-2014, 16:33
calm down, bro.
hghclsswhitetrsh
10-22-2014, 18:19
Some one, some where, always has it worse than you do.
There is so much truth to this, it's scary. Good job on keeping cool calm and collected. And congratulations on the new to you car!
Bailey Guns
10-22-2014, 18:36
I went outside and screamed and yelled and shook my fists in the air for you, Bear. I feel better. Hope you do, too! Maybe something good will happen for you tomorrow. I'll keep my fingers crossed.
Life is like a box of chocolates....
Really not worth losing health stressing over.
You have done well grasshopper...http://www.gunco.net/forums/images/smilies/chinese.gif
Aloha_Shooter
10-22-2014, 19:00
No sense sweating over material things. Sounds like you didn't so good on you. I'd trade the engines in both vehicles and my house for one more day with my Dad.
Fentonite
10-22-2014, 19:03
Good job. I used to let idiots on the road get under my skin. Road rage type stuff. My wife made me look at it in a different way: She told me that it was easy for me to get pissed and be a jerk, but it took a lot more effort (a lot more) to be calm and shrug it off. Once, when I started getting all ramped-up, ready to pull over for a "discussion" with some jerk who cut me off (or some other meaningless issue), she called me "lazy". She was right... Getting all pissed-off was easy, and it took a lot of effort to be the bigger man. I hadn't looked at it that way, but once I did, I changed. I am not lazy. I work hard. I abhor slothfulness. Recognizing my behavior as "laziness" was all it took. I still remind myself of that whenever I start getting worked-up over something, and take pride in taking the harder (wiser) path.
gnihcraes
10-22-2014, 19:58
Guess I'm granola because I drive a fit too?
Glad everything is working out, deep breath.
I went outside and screamed and yelled and shook my fists in the air for you, Bear. I feel better. Hope you do, too! Maybe something good will happen for you tomorrow. I'll keep my fingers crossed.
HA, I can see that... put on some pants next time. Geesh.
Thanks folks. Small victories. I was never a "mad" person, I just let things get to me.
Good did happen today too so it's all even better. Kiddos said they missed me in band and played their butts off, the PTO dropped off some music I ordered (granted like 6 months ago, but it finally came), and some other small things...
Good stuff. Now just need to get out to the range!
clublights
10-22-2014, 20:55
Tho it has already been said.....
A guy Called "Big Bear" in a honda fit.....
Some how that just doesn't seem right.
[Coffee]
gnihcraes
10-22-2014, 21:22
Now that I'm on a real keyboard.
I had a similar situation, needed to get a better car. Shopped around and found a honda fit for a good price, got it with small payments and it's kept me going for a long time now.
Pretty versatile little cars, What year fit?
Tho it has already been said.....
A guy Called "Big Bear" in a honda fit.....
Some how that just doesn't seem right.
[Coffee]
Right? That's what I said... at first... lol
Now that I'm on a real keyboard.
I had a similar situation, needed to get a better car. Shopped around and found a honda fit for a good price, got it with small payments and it's kept me going for a long time now.
Pretty versatile little cars, What year fit?
'12
You should have flipped your car over on the side of the road.
You should have flipped your car over on the side of the road.
For a split second, the hulk almost made an appearance...
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