An old man once taught me...

[Irving]

An old man once taught me...




That if you're too blind to see the salt, hold your hand over your food so you can feel how much you are adding before you ruin your soup.

[Zundfolge]

http://media.giphy.com/media/83QtfwKWdmSEo/giphy.gif

[Great-Kazoo]

A guy on his death bead told me too much salt shut his kidneys down.
Ocam's Razor rears it's ugly head.

[Irving]

The idea is to contribute your own lessons. Sorry I didn't have a better one to start us off.

[SSChameleon]

Salt and religion are similar. A little is good, but too much will ruin the meal.

And as an old contractor told me, if you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.

[Tinelement]

If it doesn't move,

Get a bigger effing hammer.

[BushMasterBoy]

I was born with nothing, and still have most of it left...

[Great-Kazoo]

The idea is to contribute your own lessons. Sorry I didn't have a better one to start us off.

23K post and NOW YOU'RE MAKING EXCUSES [fail] Click on the REPORT icon and try again.

[Irving]

An old man once taught me...

To take responsibility for my actions and never to make excuses.

[Scanker19]

Never chase buses or women. They'll both leave you behind.

[davsel]

Trouble always starts as fun
Broken hearts will always mend
Tough times don't last, tough people do
Nothing breaks if it can bend

Don't ever sell your saddle
Never owe another man
Watch where you spit on a windy day
Don't use words you don't understand
Find the Lord before you need him
Never lose your pride
Don't ever sell your saddle, 'cause life's a long long ride


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JOECSQECaZI

[Great-Kazoo]

An old man once taught me...

To take responsibility for my actions and never to make excuses.

The reply in post #5 is somewhat confusing then grasshopper.

[Ah Pook]

An old man once taught me dowsing.

[Lars]

If it's not worth doing right, then it isn't worth doing at all.

[rondog]

An old man once taught me-

Never try to teach a pig to sing. You'll only waste your time and annoy the pig.

[MrPrena]

I am doing exactly opposite of my old man did, and I am doing fairly okay. :D

[GilpinGuy]

AOMOTM:
"If you show up with a head like a bastard pig, I'll treat ya like one."

[Mazin]

Work smarter, not harder.

[WETWRKS]

Don't ever start a fight but make sure you end it.

[rondog]

"Don't start none, won't be none."

[Fentonite]

"Always carry a knife".
I have a cigar box full of pocket knives that old man gave me through the years.

[Big John]

Don't spit into the wind.

Better to keep mouth shut and be thought the fool than to open mouth and remove all doubt.

Never trust a fart.

[02ducky]

Trust but verify
Keep your powder dry
Dont sweat the small stuff


Never crap on another mans thread

[buffalobo]

Never look directly into the sun.

The worst you ever had was wonderful.

You can't make up for the ones you pass up.

Don't eat yellow snow.

Don't brush your teeth with a brick

And always respect your momma.

[68Charger]

Arguing with a bureaucrat is like wrestling in the mud with a pig... After a while you realize they enjoy it.

[TFOGGER]

Turner's Theorem:

The first tool was a hammer, therefore, all subsequent tools were derived FROM the hammer. As a result, ANY tool can be used AS a hammer, and conversely, a hammer can be substituted for any other tool.

[CareyH]

If there is going to be a gunfight, shoot first.

[Sixgun]

Never trust a fart and don't waste a hard on over 50.
No problems yet but I'm only 42. [shit-happens]

[Mick-Boy]

An old man in a dangerous profession got to be an old man for a reason.

100lbs of light-weight gear is still 100lbs of gear.

In mountaineering or gunfighting; Don't give up elevation you don't have to.

Someone who use the words "Never" or "Always" when talking about dealing with people probably doesn't know much about dealing with people.

[StagLefty]

An old man told me to be careful because someday I'd be the old man !

[clodhopper]

late once, wrong forever. Stop and redo it if necessary.

[Doc45]

If you learn one new thing every day by the end of the year your head will be so full of shit you won't know which end is up LOL.

[MAP]

Whether you think you can or can't you're right.

Henry Ford.

It is better to seek forgiveness then permission.

My Wife.

[crays]

Never say anything out loud that you wouldn't say in front of your grandmother.

[Mtn.man]

An old geezer, who had been a retired
farmer for a long time, became very bored
and decided to open a medical
clinic. He put a sign up outside that
said: "Get your treatment
for $500, if not cured get back
$1,000." Doctor "Young,"
who was positive that this old
geezer didn't know beans about
medicine, thought this would be a great
opportunity to get $1,000.
So he went to Dr. Geezer's clinic.

This is what transpired.

Dr. Young: "Dr. Geezer, I have lost all taste
in my mouth. can you please help me?”

Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring
medicine from box 22 and put 3
drops in Dr. Young's mouth."

Dr. Young: ”Aaagh --
This is Gasoline!"

Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got
your taste back. That will be $500."

Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back
after a couple of days figuring to recover his
money.

Dr Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember
anything."

Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box
22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."

Doctor Young: "Oh no you
don't -- that is Gasoline!"

Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory
back. That will be $500."

Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and
comes back after several more days.

Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become
weak -- I can hardly see !!!!”

Dr. Geezer: "Well, I
don't have any medicine for that
so -- here's your $1000 back."

Dr. Young: "But this is only $500."

Dr Geezer:
"Congratulations! You got your vision
back. That will be $500."

Moral of story -- Just because you're
"Young" doesn't mean that you can
outsmart an old "Geezer "

[drift_g35]

My grandfather who unfortunately found out Wednesday that he has less than one year left to live due to Leukemia once told me...

No matter what you do in life, do it with all the energy you have. And learn how to make $1,000,000 by doing it. Even if its cleaning toilets or flipping burgers.

-Louis Enriquez

[Great-Kazoo]

Old Age and Treachery Will always Overcome Youth & Skill.

[Zombie Steve]

If at first you don't succeed, figure out what you did wrong and try again.

[Jeffrey Lebowski]

Arguing with a bureaucrat is like wrestling in the mud with a pig... After a while you realize they enjoy it.


OR,
Never argue with an idiot. They'll only drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

[Sawin]

Never piss on an electric fence.

[Irving]

My grandpa once told me, "Getting old is tough, I don't think you young guys could handle it."

[SideShow Bob]

"You Don't mess around with Jim".................

[stodg73]

If you make a mistake, own it, learn from it, and do NOT make it again...

[Jumpstart]

The older I get the smarter my old man is....

[BlasterBob]

Pay attention to what the OLD guys advise. May just add a few years to your lives, keep you out of jail and maybe even save you some money.
Our advice is not ALWAYS bull shit.......[blaster]

[fly boy]

YOLO


/thread

[Landsknecht]

My Daddy always told me - Be good, if you can't, don't get caught.

He also said, Son, if you're not in bed by midnight, Go Home!

[bryjcom]

If you're not getting the answer you're looking for then your not asking the right questions or talking to the right person.

[JohnnyDrama]

One morning the range....

"Add four tenths of a grain to that load. That'll tighten those groups right up."

It went from a three inch group to less than quarter size.

[Dlesh123]

Figures don't lie, but liars figure

Can't never did anything.

[Hound]

You got to this point......... Now do something smart.

[gnihcraes]

Grandpa, old farmer:

You've got one boy helping you, all is ok.
You've got two boys helping you, all you have is half a boy.
You've got three boys helping you, you don't have a boy at all.

Figuring each time you added one, they goofed off more until nothing was getting done.

[Walker2970]

Grandpa always said " Never trust anything that can bleed for a week and live"

[wctriumph]

People are no damned good.

[Aardvark]

When buying durables: 'you can pay big once and cry big once, or you can pay a little and cry a lot'. me..."huh"? Translation: Pay for quality and you won't have to deal with getting nickle and dimed to death as you would by buying junk.

[Circuits]

Don't sweat the petty things...

and don't pet the sweaty things.

[spqrzilla]

Hit the soft parts with your hand. Hit the hard parts with a tool.

[spqrzilla]

Don't put yer pecker where you wouldn't put yer mouth.

Yeah .... that one sounds more useful than it turns out to be for some .... [Coffee]

[Joe_K]

My Grandpa a Farmer.

For chapped lips:

" Put chicken crap on em' an you'll stop licken' em!"

Taught me how to whistle

"Eat your crust or you never will whistle"

Hard work:

"Cant died in the poor house!"

Respecting your elders:

" You keep talking like that and I'll break your arm off at the elbow and beat you to death with it!"

- James Carol Liebold 1927-2005
Best Man I ever knew.

[JustAGuy]

Three useless commodities: The altitude above you, the runway behind you and the fuel you left in the fuel truck.

[wctriumph]

The bitterness of low quality lingers long after the sweetness of low price is gone.

[wctriumph]

The older I get, the faster I was.

[sellersm]

No regrets when you do the right thing.

[sellersm]

If you don't do it right the first time, you'll end up doing it again.

[TheVath]

Liquor before beer never fear, beer before liquor never sicker


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Ronin13]

"Aim small, miss small."
"Anything worth doing is worth overdoing, if you're going to shoot once, why not shoot twice?"
"If someone tells you carry too much ammo on your belt, I'll tell you they've never been in a shootout."
All said from our master firearms instructor.
And one I heard once: "If you can't kill 'em with kindness, a .45 works pretty well."

[Erni]

Bite small, chew well.
This was a statement about learning and improving not food. But I guess it applies there too.

[BladesNBarrels]

Chew, swallow, talk

[Limited GM]

"You see a man working. Leave him the hell alone."

[Big E3]

"It is pointless and unfair to engage in a battle of wit against an unarmed opponent"

[Griff79]

An old man (my Grandfather) once taught me: A place for everything, everything in its place. That way you will always know where to find things.


Griff

[spyder]

"Keep It Simple Stupid"

[Aloha_Shooter]

If it can’t be expressed in figures, it is not science; it is opinion.

Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.