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View Full Version : JUST GET TO THE DAMN POINT ALREDY! ... a rant


Zundfolge
09-25-2015, 09:22
I am so sick of these "stansberry" type marketing videos ... you know the ones "click here to see the only way you're family will survive the coming Apocalypse!" ... or financial meltdown ... or how to cheat the power company ... or learn the "one thing" that "they" don't want you to know ... etc.

Then after you've already clicked on the stupid video they spend 10 minutes trying to convince you how important the video is and how badly you need to watch it ... Jeebus I'm already watching it ... JUST GET ON WITH IT!

Then they spend 15 minutes telling you "a little bit about myself" to convince you that they're worth listening to. They run through all the predictions they've made over the years that came true (that you never heard of) and how many high paying jobs they've had and what not ... only the don't often tell you their fucking name.

Then they spend 2-3 minutes laying out the actual subject of the video (usually in the vaguest terms possible and its never as important or interesting as promised).

Then there's 10-15 more minutes trying to convince you that they haven't actually told you everything and you need to order their seminar or books or silver coins or whatever.

Then if you close the damn video a javascript pops up a page saying "are you sure you want to let your family suffer and die because you're too lazy to watch my video?"

Fucking assholes.

Anyway there needs to be a term for these kinds of videos (and a special room in hell for those that create them).
HoneyBadger
09-25-2015, 09:26
Just clickbait. They make money. They wouldn't do it if it didn't work. [Dunno]

And yes, I think we're all sick of them.




Not enough angry faces and (@^#$^(&. No pictures of clock bombs. No link to the actual content on which the rant is based. 6/10.
BushMasterBoy
09-25-2015, 09:26
Obama-grams?
funkymonkey1111
09-25-2015, 10:13
as honeybadger said, they're called "clickbait"

"when she saw this in her salad, she was amazed....!"

"thug points gun at grandma. her reaction was not what you think...."
Zundfolge
09-25-2015, 10:22
Just clickbait. They make money. They wouldn't do it if it didn't work. [Dunno]

I don't see how they work to make money though ... unless the idea is that the irritating aspects of them weed out people smart enough not to fall for the sales pitch. Even then I fail to see how they make money.

Oh and thanks for the 6/10 ... I think you're being a little generous since there wasn't enough F-bombs.
HoneyBadger
09-25-2015, 11:11
I don't see how they work to make money though ... unless the idea is that the irritating aspects of them weed out people smart enough not to fall for the sales pitch. Even then I fail to see how they make money.

Oh and thanks for the 6/10 ... I think you're being a little generous since there wasn't enough F-bombs.
Like I said... They wouldn't do it if it didn't work. [Dunno]

And I'm okay with the 6/10. I'm not a fan of F-bombs.

Would have been a 7/10 if you blamed it on the pope.


Edit: Now it's a 6.61 for having eventually sort of blamed the pope after some prompting.
Irving
09-25-2015, 11:33
You're the last person I would expect would even click on those videos. What gives?
Aloha_Shooter
09-25-2015, 12:01
Someone clicks on crap like that?
Hummer
09-25-2015, 12:33
I call them garbage ads, nothing but trash content designed to get people to click on more advertising. I hate them. The owner of Glock Talk bought into the garbage ad business, really screwed the pooch for the forums. Maybe he makes $ from it, but without my continued participation.
brutal
09-25-2015, 12:42
Someone clicks on crap like that?

This
PugnacAutMortem
09-25-2015, 13:03
Would have been a 7/10 if you blamed it on the pope.

I think it would be 7.77/10 by blaming it on the pope.
brutal
09-25-2015, 13:04
I think it would be 7.77/10 by blaming it on the pope.

Did you mean 6.66/10 ?
PugnacAutMortem
09-25-2015, 13:15
Did you mean 6.66/10 ?

Depends on what you think of the dude I would wager.
BushMasterBoy
09-25-2015, 14:02
Some of this crap is disguised as "sponsored news".
SideShow Bob
09-25-2015, 15:52
You're the last person I would expect would even click on those videos. What gives?

He even clicks on the "See my nude pictures" e-mails in the junk e-mails file.
HoneyBadger
09-25-2015, 16:08
He even clicks on the "See my nude pictures" e-mails in the junk e-mails file.
How do you know he has those emails? Are YOU the one sending them?? [Eek3]
SideShow Bob
09-25-2015, 16:11
How do you know he has those emails? Are YOU the one sending them?? [Eek3]

You will have to open them up to find out...............
HoneyBadger
09-25-2015, 16:13
You will have to open them up to find out...............


I was going to make a witty reply about the necessity of having a chainsaw in the nude pics... but then I realized how weird it sounded. Carry on, good sir.
Monky
09-25-2015, 16:14
Like I said... They wouldn't do it if it didn't work. [Dunno]

And I'm okay with the 6/10. I'm not a fan of F-bombs.

Would have been a 7/10 if you blamed it on the pope.

If he blamed it on the pope.. you'd be the one dropping F bombs
Zundfolge
09-25-2015, 16:43
You're the last person I would expect would even click on those videos. What gives?

No, I don't click on them now ... but I find them in my inbox all the time (sometimes from sources that should frankly know better ... damn Pope!)
HoneyBadger
09-25-2015, 17:31
No, I don't click on them now ... but I find them in my inbox all the time (sometimes from sources that should frankly know better ... damn Pope!)
Upgraded original score above.
sroz
09-25-2015, 17:53
Sounds like you watched the whole thing. That deserves a rant score of wait let me see.........Zero
ray1970
09-25-2015, 18:28
Reminds me of the time my wife wanted me to watch a video to help her figure out how to do one of her craft things. It was an eight minute long video to explain something simple. The first seven and a half minutes were some lady explaining what she was about to demonstrate. The last thirty seconds was the actual demonstration. Needless to say, I fast forwarded through her bull and got straight to the actual instruction part.
TEAMRICO
09-25-2015, 18:32
Click ____Here______ to see why you should hear my response.
My reaction is not what you think!!!
Irving
09-25-2015, 20:11
Click ____Here______ to see why you should hear my response.
My reaction is not what you think!!!

You can avoid those articles just by doing this one simple trick!
Justin
09-25-2015, 20:29
I don't see how they work to make money though ... unless the idea is that the irritating aspects of them weed out people smart enough not to fall for the sales pitch. Even then I fail to see how they make money.That's exactly the purpose of those videos. Think of those videos like a salesman who's going through a list and doing cold calls. The people who slam the door in his face, or tell him to leave in the first two minutes aren't going to buy, but the people who sit through the whole sales pitch are much more likely to bite.