View Full Version : Most Tactical as Fu&% you ever seen
Took my 8 year old up into the hills shooting today.
Pull up to the little public range and see two guys wearing condors full catalog. I wait to watch and see if they are safe or dipshits. Not handling guns in unsafe manner seems cool. Right when we're going to get out we hear "cover me I'm reloading"! Kid asked me if they're playing call of duty. Couldn't help chuckle and say nope just practicing.
Roll out the midway shooting mat as far away as possible. Get my boy set up with his youth xt 22 single shot. Telling him to build a good position no finger on the trigger till cross hairs are on target bla bla I move to his other side where I can watch him as well as the other shooters.
That's when I see him fellers. Two 45s, akimbo, a brace of pistols like fuckin Outlaw Josey Wales advancing firing probably not hitting shit but burning ammo twice as fast. I couldn't hold back laughter. I might have pissed my pants a little. Yes I did get my camera out in time. Think I have one good picture. If there is any interest I'll might post it. It could be a member for all I know lol. Most tactical as fuck guy I ever seen.
Sometimes shooting akimbo is just a fantasy that we must live out. It is probably something that people only do about once or twice before getting it out of their system.
Yea the guy being older seemed to make even stranger. When I was young and dumb I tried it with snubbed 357s. This was part of his load out if you will. He was practicing.
Sometimes shooting akimbo is just a fantasy that we must live out. It is probably something that people only do about once or twice before getting it out of their system.
Been there, huh?
[Coffee]
I'd like to see the pictures of the hardcore operator. If it is a member here we need to out him and have an intervention anyways.
. Yes I did get my camera out in time. Think I have one good picture. If there is any interest I'll might post it. It could be a member for all I know lol. Most tactical as fuck guy I ever seen.
Hail yes, post it, and make sure it's a nice large image! :p
Big John
09-27-2015, 17:01
Pics or it didn't happen.
buffalobo
09-27-2015, 17:01
Been there, huh?
[Coffee]
I'd like to see the pictures of the hardcore operator. If it is a member here we need to out him and have an intervention anyways.
^^^This.
Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk
I need to akimbo again. The Shadow knows.
Yea the guy being older seemed to make even stranger. When I was young and dumb I tried it with snubbed 357s. This was part of his load out if you will. He was practicing.
I see, didn't catch this the first time. Sounds like someone who works at the Army Surplus store. Awaiting pictures.
Boondock Saints, anyone? I've GOT to see this photo...
SideShow Bob
09-27-2015, 18:17
CapLock is more of a tease than a high school date.
CapLock is more of a tease than a high school date.
We showed up to the party, where all the girls at?
Was it one of these guys?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suO4ws5YWz0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tupQ8rZkl50
These guys?
https://simontang.smugmug.com/Shooting/Shooting-10-13/i-Lhwf2mv/0/XL/MN8A0489-XL.jpg
I'm not sure, but I think the bow may have been about showing respect to the targets before laying down the hate.
His friend looked cooler in multi cam. The all black doesn't do it for me.
[Eek3][ROFL3]
I laughed so hard I snorted.
Holger Danske
09-27-2015, 20:25
Got all the gear doesnt he? Did he low crawl to the firing line? I see hes got knee pads
jhood001
09-27-2015, 20:30
Anyone who knows anything understands that you only akimbo double barrel sawed-of shotguns.
I'm not sure, but I think the bow may have been about showing respect to the targets before laying down the hate.
Well you gotta stretch first , duh.
Pretty sure I woulda packed up and left, or filmed the rest of the action. Lol
I'm not sure, but I think the bow may have been about showing respect to the targets before laying down the hate.
That has to be one of the funniest statements I have read all year.
HoneyBadger
09-27-2015, 20:44
Well... as long as he didn't hurt anybody I guess I don't see the issue. It's a free country, right? [Dunno] Maybe he's weird, maybe he is acting out a weird fantasy in a safe way. Whatever. Doesn't seem like much of a threat. [ROFL1]
Never understood the akimbo thing... somehow I don't think that twice the bullets at the same time would increase my odds of hitting the target... lol
If I had to face a wall of attackers in an alley, within 7 yards, I'd like to have two guns going at the same time. Only at first though.
Pretty sure the guy's a ninja. The black outfit is a dead giveaway.
Okay I admit... I've done this... just because.
Left and right handed AR pistols. Complete with (PWS 556) buddy fuckers. C'mon, you gotta do it just once.
JohnnyEgo
09-27-2015, 21:50
So I am guilty of having done the 'Last Man Standing' with two .45s, and somewhere I have pictures of it.
What I can't get over is going full mall-ninja tactical at the old public range.
At my most charitable, my libertarian impulses tell me it's a free country and he's not hurting anyone.
At my most paranoid, he's saving a bullet for the bitch, one for the dirtbag she stepped out with, and the last one for himself.
Edit to add: My 'Last Man Standing' moment managed to consume 22 .45 ACP rounds and still not hit the milk jugs six yards out from me.
The only thing that could make this picture better would be a nice pair of brown loafers.
Great-Kazoo
09-27-2015, 22:10
Sometimes shooting akimbo is just a fantasy that we must live out. It is probably something that people only do about once or twice before getting it out of their system.
AKIMBO, wasn't he a MMA fighter?
"say hello to me littl' frens!"
61194
61195
So which one of you guys that work Tanner took this guy to the cleaners?
HoneyBadger
09-27-2015, 22:44
CONFIRMED: Black does not camouflage well in the forest in broad daylight. Buy multicam. [Neene3]
I imagine this sort of thing (playing dress up) happens on private property. The fact they were on public land disturbs me a bit. I think I would have left before setting up.
Thanks for the pics.
Martinjmpr
09-28-2015, 07:16
Sometimes shooting akimbo is just a fantasy that we must live out. It is probably something that people only do about once or twice before getting it out of their system.
Buddy of mine shot a kimbo once. Out of season and no license. Game warden was PISSED!
Pretty sure the guy's a ninja. The black outfit is a dead giveaway.
Wrong, if he was a real ninja the camera would have been unable to capture his image as he would have been moving too fast. At most this guy is a ninja-wannabe.
Wrong, if he was a real ninja the camera would have been unable to capture his image as he would have been moving too fast. At most this guy is a ninja-wannabe.
Good point. Perhaps he's just a mall ninja. I know they show up in photographs. I've seen pictures online.
Zombie Steve
09-28-2015, 07:54
I've seen guys get their Tommy Tactical gear on to go to the gun store before, but I've also seen them don their full cowboy regalia to go look at the used rack.
But to answer the OP's question, once Bobbyfairbanks and I went to a gun range and were blessed with seeing a couple - Tommy and Tammy Tactical who decided they were running the range. Of course, there weren't any target stands, because Tommy and Tammy had all of them lined up at 3-5 yards in front of them. They made sure to tell us that they compete (presumably with the same matching 5 11 pants, desert boots, kneepads, drop holsters and boonie hats). They sucked at shooting, yet wanted to instruct everyone on how to shoot. I repaired a broken stand and happened to be having a good day tearing up a target at 25 yards with some full house .44 mag. But since I was wearing jeans, I clearly wasn't cool enough for Tommy. He came over to tell me how cool he is and how I was chewing up the bullseye wrong, and I immediately gave him my best stinkeye and did my best Conifer Jack impression - bet him $50 for best score at 25 yards timed or untimed. He promptly found some other guy to go instruct. Luckily, he did not attempt to make contact with Bobby.
The more rare sighting, of course was Tammy Tactical. This one had a the most shrill voice I've ever heard of any species, and couldn't really imagine such a Banshee howl without hearing protection. Apparently the female of the species assumes control of when people are allowed to shoot. I'm serious when I say it was the most spine-wrenching noise I've ever heard...
"RAAAAANGE IS HAAAAAAWT! RAAAAAAAAANGE IS COOOOOLD!"
Just thinking about it makes me smile to this day.
encorehunter
09-28-2015, 08:05
I'm a bit curious. I don't see any dirt on this guy. Everytime I go to the range I am covered in dirt, whether I'm in blue jeans or khaki's.
HoneyBadger
09-28-2015, 08:34
I'm a bit curious. I don't see any dirt on this guy. Everytime I go to the range I am covered in dirt, whether I'm in blue jeans or khaki's.
hahaha good point!
Maybe they are the ones whose parents would not buy them GI Joe or Planet of the Apes figures when they were kids...I tell you it is not their fault. [ROFL2]
Steve, I think I encountered Tactical Tammy once...I went to another range.
Martinjmpr
09-28-2015, 09:43
Good point. Perhaps he's just a mall ninja. I know they show up in photographs. I've seen pictures online.
Mall Ninja is to Real Ninja as Mall Cop is to Real Cop.
PugnacAutMortem
09-28-2015, 09:57
AKIMBO, wasn't he a MMA fighter?
Color me impressed, you are correct! Kimbo Slice is an MMA fighter now but he got famous for Youtube street brawls. I'm even more impressed you recognized the name as an MMA fighter instead of the Youtube fighter.
Bravo sir. [rockon]
Kraven251
09-28-2015, 10:41
So all black on a sunny Colorado day... I suspect they are from Maryland and were just out here for the weekend.
I may or may not have dressed like that for Halloween at one time...
I may or may not have dressed like that for Halloween at one time...
Were you looking for this guy (middle)?
https://www.ar-15.co/attachment.php?attachmentid=61209&d=1419535526
I fired off two 1911's two-handed once, just to say I did it. Waste of ammo IMO.
http://static.comicvine.com/uploads/scale_super/1/18154/4026800-grendelvsshadow-1alt-6b696-300b7.jpg
The actors you saw in the woods were having wardrobe malfunctions.
The SHADOW KNOWS.
I fired off two 1911's two-handed once, just to say I did it. Waste of ammo IMO.
I fired off 5 rounds of 00-buck high brass once, because Kelly the Belly challenged me. Waste of HIS ammo, and I'd do it again :D
HoneyBadger
09-28-2015, 16:19
I fired off 5 rounds of 00-buck high brass once, because Kelly the Belly challenged me. Waste of HIS ammo, and I'd do it again :D
Actually, the challenge was to do 1oz slugs one handed from the pistol grip. And you didn't come through. [Poke]
Actually, the challenge was to do 1oz slugs one handed from the pistol grip. And you didn't come through. [Poke]
I've done that and never could understand why it was a challenge. Now if he had to hold the pistol grip in his teeth...
SideShow Bob
09-28-2015, 17:29
Mall Ninja is to Real Ninja as Mall Cop is to Real Cop.
Better a mall ninja than a Rexall Ranger..........
Mr Spooky
09-28-2015, 17:46
Sometimes I gear up when I shoot. How else are you supposed to find out what gear works and doesn't? Where the hang ups are? Practice how you play, right? I keep mags in my plate carrier, you keep them in your back pocket. Different strokes I guess.
Those two in the multicam, if they are on here feel free to contact me and we can run n gun at my place. Run the steel plate obstacle course. I will bring the pbj sammies and yall bring the rice crispy treats.
There are worse things to blow your money on.
Mr Spooky
09-28-2015, 18:02
Mall Ninja is to Real Ninja as Mall Cop is to Real Cop.
Real Cop = overweight black woman that only got the job for those reasons.
SideShow Bob
09-28-2015, 18:04
I think the Mods should change Spooky's title to " Tactical as Fu&% "..........
Mr Spooky
09-28-2015, 18:16
I was thinking "tiny twig" but " Tactical as Fu&%" does sound better.
The only thing that could make this picture better would be a nice pair of brown loafers.
LMAO!!
[ROFL1]
I can't believe this one hasn't made the thread yet...
http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b332/kopfjaeger762/fatasstactical.jpg
Actually, the challenge was to do 1oz slugs one handed from the pistol grip. And you didn't come through. [Poke]
send the ammo and challenge accepted :D
I can't believe this one hasn't made the thread yet...
http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b332/kopfjaeger762/fatasstactical.jpg
WHen did oompa-loompas start dressing like mall ninjas?
SideShow Bob
09-28-2015, 21:10
I can't believe this one hasn't made the thread yet...
It did, it was in the funny pictures thread about 2 years ago. It had the caption "Don't worry Ma'am, I'm from the Internet......" Where have you been ?
It did, it was in the funny pictures thread about 2 years ago. Where have you been ?
This thread. Where have you been? [handbags]
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61195
No doubt, that's Edward Martini from Woodland Park. Did he clean up his trash this time?
HoneyBadger
09-29-2015, 08:29
No doubt, that's Edward Martini from Woodland Park. Did he clean up his trash this time?
[ROFL2][ROFL3][ROFL2][ROFL3]
Well, that's it - Close the thread! Nobody can do better than that!
https://www.google.com/search?sourceid=chrome-psyapi2&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8&q=edward%20martini%20woodland%20park&oq=edward%20martini%20woodland%20park&aqs=chrome..69i57.9191j0j7
Martinjmpr
09-29-2015, 09:00
Back in about 1993 I was at a gun show with a buddy of mine. It was a pretty big gun show, lots of stuff there, and well attended.
So as we're standing there, we see this guy walk up. Looked to be in his late 40's, long-ish greasy hair, has a woodland camo boonie hat over his obviously receding hairline, was wearing what appeared to be a brand new set of woodland BDU pants (no wear at all) that were bloused (tucked, for you civilians) into obviously new and not even broken in black jungle boots. I think he also had a sheath knife on his belt, which, like the rest of his ensemble, appeared to be brand new and unused.
But the piece de resistance was the black t-shirt stretched like spandex over his enormous protruding fat beer gut. The shirt had a logo with a grinning skull wearing a maroon beret and it read
"MERCENARIES NEVER DIE, THEY JUST GO TO HELL AND REGROUP!
[ROFL1][ROFL1][ROFL1][LOL][LOL]
Oh, but wait, I haven't told you the best part: You see, this gun show was in Fayetteville, NC, A/K/A "Fayette-Nam", home of Fort Bragg, the 82nd Airborne Division, XVIII Airborne Corps, the JFK Special Warfare Center and School, 3rd and 7th Special Forces Groups, JSOC, and of course SFOD-D. So this clown "mercenary" was walking around dressed like this while surrounded by actual paratroopers, SF guys and other real warriors.
My only assumption was that he was either mentally defective, or else he was an ATF agent who said "I'll dress up just like the gun nuts do and infiltrate their gun show." Of course, if that was true then he probably WAS somehow mentally defective.
Rucker61
09-29-2015, 09:22
Oh, but wait, I haven't told you the best part: You see, this gun show was in Fayetteville, NC, A/K/A "Fayette-Nam", home of Fort Bragg, the 82nd Airborne Division, XVIII Airborne Corps, the JFK Special Warfare Center and School, 3rd and 7th Special Forces Groups, JSOC, and of course SFOD-D. So this clown "mercenary" was walking around dressed like this while surrounded by actual paratroopers, SF guys and other real warriors.
My only assumption was that he was either mentally defective, or else he was an ATF agent who said "I'll dress up just like the gun nuts do and infiltrate their gun show." Of course, if that was true then he probably WAS somehow mentally defective.
Maybe he was trying to impress 1st COSCOM.
BushMasterBoy
09-29-2015, 10:47
Maybe they are working on their resume for an Area 51 job?
Is that my brother.... He is on here....
Nah, he doesn't shoot pistols anyway.[AR15][UZI][ROFL3]
People like this crack me up. If I'm at the range just having fun, the last thing I want to do is throw on a bunch of kit and sweat my ass off.
Martinjmpr
09-29-2015, 13:57
Maybe he was trying to impress 1st COSCOM.
HEY! [Kick3]
The first rule of COSCOM is that you don't talk about COSCOM.
The SECOND rule of COSCOM is that YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT COSCOM!
Now, beat your boots! [hahhah-no]
cfortune
09-29-2015, 16:41
Izzy was up shooting in the mountains last weekend. That isn't him but he was probably in that crew.
Mr Spooky
09-29-2015, 17:21
<---- I see what you did there. Aint that the truth! From here on out while at the range I will be sure to double fist pistols all day! If you are going to take my pic, just let me know so you can get my good side. I will still share my pizza rolls with all you denim wearing common folk though.
Izzy was up shooting in the mountains last weekend. That isn't him but he was probably in that crew.
I was going to town with a pair of tec-9s like Lana Kane.
61253
buffalobo
09-29-2015, 19:53
I was thinking "tiny twig" but " Tactical as Fu&%" does sound better.
I think the Mods should change Spooky's title to " Tactical as Fu&% "..........
Poof!
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theGinsue
09-29-2015, 20:41
Poof!
Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk
Hmm. Curious thing.
[Coffee]
buffalobo
09-29-2015, 20:42
Hmm. Curious thing.
[Coffee]
You can't BS me, it's magic or unicorn dust.
Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk
I was going to town with a pair of tec-9s like Lana Kane.61253LANAAAAAAAAAA!
BPTactical
09-30-2015, 06:37
I see, didn't catch this the first time. Sounds like someone who works at the Army Surplus store. Awaiting pictures.
You mean the full blown Tool One Operator with the 37 knives on his person at the Pecos store? The kid and I actually busted out laughing right in front of him.
I will bet he has a brace of HiPoints....
You mean the full blown Tool One Operator with the 37 knives on his person at the Pecos store? The kid and I actually busted out laughing right in front of him.
I will bet he has a brace of HiPoints....
The very one.
encorehunter
09-30-2015, 09:08
Is that my brother.... He is on here....
Nah, he doesn't shoot pistols anyway.[AR15][UZI][ROFL3]
Don't make me tell everyone about the Galls magazine you dumped out on the floor yesterday, or bring up your Tactical trauma shears...
The only one who can get away wearing this much black was Johnny Cash
61195
Judging where those pistols are aiming, I believe I've found the identity of the mystery shooter.
http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/c/cf/Crosseyed.jpg/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/299?cb=20070821135109
Same mustache for sure.
wctriumph
10-01-2015, 18:26
Nope, no one I know ...
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