View Full Version : For those of you that want to pull your f&*÷ing hair out at work
Another ha ha lol at me post.
Today's customer... I'm relaying a front porch and walk way in Flagstone.
Supposed to only be tuckpointing the joints but every Stone is loose. Who ever laid
It before did a shit job. Pretty much relaying every Stone there is.
End of the day comes and I wrap the entire job in caution tape. I explain to the customer that we can't
have anyone walk on the freshly laid flagstone. He assures me he gets it and will keep the kids off it.
At that moment the poor dumb son of a bitch steps over the tape. Walks across about 8 stones bends over to point at a rock and asks if the old mortar he smeared on a long time ago would clean off.
I was dumb founded and at a loss of words except for wow and fuck. Just kept repeating that to myself....lol.
Bailey Guns
03-23-2017, 18:43
I would've verbally murdered him...after he paid me.
[facepalm] He "gets it". Sure he does.
I had a lady point out some pitted concrete on the porch and ask me if it was hail damage today. I told her if that was from hail, the house wouldn't be standing. While not an everyday occurrence, I've had people ask me that before.
lol I have those moments at work a lot by apprentices, operators, and the general public.
I once pulled up to a flagger holding a stop sign at a street construction project. I stopped, waved at him, then proceeded right into the intersection. He was less than happy. I started laughing after I realized how dumb I looked.
Most of the time i want to throat punch someone at work.
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Fuck.
Wow.
Couldn't have said it better lmao!!
Bailey Guns
03-24-2017, 07:00
I had people do all sorts of stupid shit when I was a cop. Like walk up and ask directions while you're holding someone at gunpoint. Few things surprise me any more.
I had people do all sorts of stupid shit when I was a cop. Like walk up and ask directions while you're holding someone at gunpoint. Few things surprise me any more.
Ya you can't fix stupid!!
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Office lobby in my building, signs posted, strictly no phone calls allowed.
Situation: Woman on her cell yapping away.
Me: "Excuse me Ma'm, no phone calls are allowed in this area. Texting, or emailing is"
Her: "I'm sorry Officer"
"Sharon I'll have to call you back buh-bye!"
5 minutes later same woman on her phone talking on speaker phone, cell about a foot in front of her face.
Me: "Ma'm didn't we just talk about this?"
Her: "Oh, but I thought you just didn't want the phone to my ear!"
Me: "Under what scenario would no phone calls allowed in a quiet office space = speaker phone calls with volume cranked up to 11 be good to go?"
Velocitas, Opprimere,
Violentia Operandi
Well...last night on camera I watched a tweeker take a massive liquid shit in one of our elevators at a Commuter Rail Station. So there's that.
GilpinGuy
03-24-2017, 17:45
Well...last night on camera I watched a tweeker take a massive liquid shit in one of our elevators at a Commuter Rail Station. So there's that.
We see people shit and piss themselves pretty regularly at work. Sad. It's always a bit awkward approaching these people and explaining why they have to leave.
Ya you can't fix stupid!!
Sure ya can! It's just not legal to do so.
Sure ya can! It's just not legal to do so.
Good point!!
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My wife has a bunch of great ones, but I can't get her on here to tell them. Once she was telling a guy that she needed proof of his payment. No joke, he texted her a selfie of him standing in line at the bank.
SideShow Bob
03-24-2017, 19:19
Ad ew years ago while building some traffic signal at a new entrance to a sub division on the west side of the metro area, I saw a lady drive around the road closed type 4 barricades onto hot, freshly laid, unrolled asphalt.
Needless to say, she was undercarriage deep in 300+ degree aphault 25 or more feet from the lip of the cut line.
Too much to hope the car lit on fire and she got bonfired eh?
The Norseman
03-24-2017, 20:33
Well...last night on camera I watched a tweeker take a massive liquid shit in one of our elevators at a Commuter Rail Station. So there's that.
Now that's fu@$ked up....
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Now that's fu@$ked up....
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Got to watch a (not attractive) couple having sex in an elevator about a week ago too. [Puke]
Another image that fire and an ice pick can't remove from my brain. For some reason our elevators at the light rail/commuter rail stations have been a hot spot lately. Joys of public safety...
GilpinGuy
03-25-2017, 06:21
LOL Squeeze. Monitoring video can entertaining.
I don't do that, but we did have a guy leave his hotel room, buck naked with lipstick on, get into an elevator and kiss himself in the mirror repeatedly, touching certain parts of his anatomy, etc., then proceed to go down the escalator onto the main casino floor. The elevator part was relayed to us from surveillance. Quite a show.
Fuckin lunatics.
Ad ew years ago while building some traffic signal at a new entrance to a sub division on the west side of the metro area, I saw a lady drive around the road closed type 4 barricades onto hot, freshly laid, unrolled asphalt.
Needless to say, she was undercarriage deep in 300+ degree aphault 25 or more feet from the lip of the cut line.
Some peoples parents should have worn a condom.
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LOL Squeeze. Monitoring video can entertaining.
I don't do that, but we did have a guy leave his hotel room, buck naked with lipstick on, get into an elevator and kiss himself in the mirror repeatedly, touching certain parts of his anatomy, etc., then proceed to go down the escalator onto the main casino floor. The elevator part was relayed to us from surveillance. Quite a show.
Fuckin lunatics.
Yeah, it's a really f'd up world out there right now. Anymore, things I see on our cameras fails to shock me. The degradation of society is truly astonishing and sad. Not sure what the future holds for our society but it scares me to think of the crap my kids are gonna have to deal with when they get older.
As long as someone's brought up despair.com, I've had this poster hanging outside my office at work for about 7 years:
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25 years ago I had a guy come in my showroom and wanted to by a miter box because his table saw was "unsafe". If you count your thumb as 1 and your pinky finger as 5 he was missing fingers three and four on both hands. Having sold powered woodworking machinery for years I had seen many injuries and you could start to see how many had happen but this one was unclear because the fingers around three and four remained. He went on to explain how he lost his fingers on the right hand making an unusual cut on the saw. Both hands were bandaged and the left hand was clearly more recently wrapped. I asked how he did the left hand and he went on to tell me how he had a few friends over a couple of days later and was explaining how the original accident happened and, well you can guess the rest of the story.
Although I had several dozen of the model of miter box in stock that he wanted, I explained that we were out of stock, but sent him up the street to a competitor.
25 years ago I had a guy come in my showroom and wanted to by a miter box because his table saw was "unsafe". If you count your thumb as 1 and your pinky finger as 5 he was missing fingers three and four on both hands. Having sold powered woodworking machinery for years I had seen many injuries and you could start to see how many had happen but this one was unclear because the fingers around three and four remained. He went on to explain how he lost his fingers on the right hand making an unusual cut on the saw. Both hands were bandaged and the left hand was clearly more recently wrapped. I asked how he did the left hand and he went on to tell me how he had a few friends over a couple of days later and was explaining how the original accident happened and, well you can guess the rest of the story.
Although I had several dozen of the model of miter box in stock that he wanted, I explained that we were out of stock, but sent him up the street to a competitor.
Oh my gosh... after the medical bills, it would have been cheaper for him to hire a carpenter.
osok-308
03-26-2017, 10:44
The other day, a lady asked if it's illegal for someone's dog to bark at you if you're in the dog's line of sight.......on his own property........ WHAT?????
Did you tell her that dogs can't own property?
25 years ago I had a guy come in my showroom and wanted to by a miter box because his table saw was "unsafe". If you count your thumb as 1 and your pinky finger as 5 he was missing fingers three and four on both hands. Having sold powered woodworking machinery for years I had seen many injuries and you could start to see how many had happen but this one was unclear because the fingers around three and four remained. He went on to explain how he lost his fingers on the right hand making an unusual cut on the saw. Both hands were bandaged and the left hand was clearly more recently wrapped. I asked how he did the left hand and he went on to tell me how he had a few friends over a couple of days later and was explaining how the original accident happened and, well you can guess the rest of the story.
In high school, my shop teacher told us about someone that had cut their thumb down the middle pushing a piece of wood through a band saw. When he asked about what happened, the student showed the shop teacher how he did it and the dumb SOB DID IT AGAIN!
osok-308
03-26-2017, 12:02
Did you tell her that dogs can't own property?
I truly wish that I had thought of that at the time. I just said "They're dogs, that's what dogs do."
Seamonkey
04-06-2017, 17:00
Jerry Clower had a joke like that but with two burnt ears and an ironing board close to the phone. Yup, wouldn't you know it the dang phone rang again?
OSHA has really damped the rate of Darwin award winners........
A litigious population has probably done more. Now we live in the nanny state. Circuit breakers on hair dryers, for example.
The gene pool could use a bit more chlorine.
GilpinGuy
04-06-2017, 22:33
We promoted a woman to full time manager. Fairly large pay increase, way better job, 4 tens schedule, etc.
She accepts the position, then immediately starts complaining about working Sundays because she always has Bronco parties, going to the GM about it, etc. - before she even starts in the position! [facepalm]
GM tells me to handle it. I told her straight up: This is the job and the schedule. Do you want it or should we offer it to someone else? She took it, bit I see drama in my future.
Fucking entitled people.....
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