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View Full Version : "You get your b***hass back in the kitchen...and make me some pie!"



Bailey Guns
06-16-2019, 14:37
Who knew getting your wife to make you a pie on father's day would be so complicated?

Go to orchard. Pick cherries:
https://i.imgur.com/15AguIB.jpg

Wash cherries then pit cherries (add a heaping dose of bitching about what a PITA it is to pit cherries):
https://i.imgur.com/LcVqTfC.jpg

Aside from hanging around in the kitchen asking, "Is is ready yet?", my part is done.

Make cherry pie filling:
https://i.imgur.com/9kjiUJQ.jpg


Mmmm...flour and butter. Look at all the glutens in there!:
https://i.imgur.com/IEJslux.jpg

Forming the non-organic, non-free range, non-gluten free crust in the pie pan:
https://i.imgur.com/fxlOybN.jpg

Add a little extra butter. Can't let it go to waste:
https://i.imgur.com/JHvUtRI.jpg

Ready for the oven:
https://i.imgur.com/DRFhdX5.jpg

In the oven:
https://i.imgur.com/0sjkHkZ.jpg

Baked cherry goodness:
https://i.imgur.com/JlcBzcK.jpg



Happy Fathers Day!

BPTactical
06-16-2019, 14:57
Did you ever buy your wife a watch?

Bailey Guns
06-16-2019, 15:00
Negative...stove has a clock. And timer.

Mtneer
06-16-2019, 15:07
At least you didn't make her plant the trees.

JohnnyEgo
06-16-2019, 15:54
Your wife's pie crimping game is on point, as the kids say. Beautiful pie.

StagLefty
06-16-2019, 16:02
Negative...stove has a clock. And timer.

I thought the smoke alarm was a timer ??? [facepalm]

BPTactical
06-16-2019, 17:21
Negative...stove has a clock. And timer.

Good man


https://youtu.be/RisWH8iMLdE

Bailey Guns
06-16-2019, 17:25
I thought the smoke alarm was a timer ??? [facepalm]

Mrs BG is..uh-hum...quite skilled in the kitchen...culinarily speaking, of course. I didn't get this physique by accident.

whitewalrus
06-16-2019, 20:41
Pie looks great and I am sure it tastes amazing. I love fresh fruit pies

ChickNorris
06-16-2019, 21:33
Peach is my favorite



& blueberry

Gman
06-16-2019, 22:07
Apple is my favorite.

I like peach as a cobbler/crisp.

Something tells me that BG's relationship with the little lady is slightly different in real life than the way it's presented in this thread. I didn't see any pictures of him wearing the pie.

Justin
06-17-2019, 09:33
Looks fantastic.

I'm basically a sucker for any kind of fruit pie; apple, blueberry, rhubarb, cherry, its all good.

For my birthday last year I got an apple green chile pie and it was quite good.

Bailey Guns
06-17-2019, 09:54
Apple/green chile sounds fantastic. May have to try that.

We She cooks a lot of blackberry stuff...because they're everywhere up here. We should have peaches ripening in about 2 months or so. These cherries came from the neighbors. They're out of town and we managed to salvage a gallon or so before the birds got them all. We should have our own peaches, cherries, apples and pears next year.

Bailey Guns
06-17-2019, 09:57
Something tells me that BG's relationship with the little lady is slightly different in real life than the way it's presented in this thread.

I rule this household with an iron fist!

We've only been married 30 years so I haven't really decided if she's a keeper or not. Keeps her on her toes.

Erni
06-17-2019, 09:58
For those who like apple pie, search for Grandma Opals pue recepie. Stupid good.

Gman
06-17-2019, 10:05
Blackberries are weeds in the PNW. I like those in cobblers. I think they'd be so much better without the seeds, but then that might spoil me.

Skip
06-17-2019, 10:13
Good humor, yes, but I'm thankful there is a still a place on the internet where such a thread can exist.

OP is a lucky guy!

Bailey Guns
06-17-2019, 10:56
Blackberries are weeds in the PNW.

The first summer we were here we were like, "Oh, cool! Blackberries! Right in our yard!" Even started a thread here about how wonderful they were.

Now were like, "Fuckin' blackberries!" You can't get rid of them and they take over everything in a matter of weeks. It's a constant battle of ripping them out of the earth with the tractor when I can, spraying them with copious amounts of Round-Up when necessary, or burning them. Doesn't matter. All it takes is one bird, one pooped-out seed and it starts all over again.

At least they're tasty. They're the really big and plump Himalayan variety and they are considered an invasive species. The thorns are like razor wire.

Irving
06-17-2019, 11:20
The thorns are like razor wire.

Have to be careful where you're driving your tank then.

Justin
06-17-2019, 16:29
Apple/green chile sounds fantastic. May have to try that.

We She cooks a lot of blackberry stuff...because they're everywhere up here. We should have peaches ripening in about 2 months or so. These cherries came from the neighbors. They're out of town and we managed to salvage a gallon or so before the birds got them all. We should have our own peaches, cherries, apples and pears next year.

It was quite good. Sweet, apple flavor with a touch of smoke and spice.

BladesNBarrels
06-17-2019, 16:32
All it takes is one bird, one pooped-out seed and it starts all over again. At least they're tasty.

Got to quit that speed reading. Made out to be a whole different topic. It's like the kopi luwak coffee beans.

ChickNorris
06-17-2019, 16:38
I read it that way the first time too.

Gman
06-17-2019, 21:31
The first summer we were here we were like, "Oh, cool! Blackberries! Right in our yard!" Even started a thread here about how wonderful they were.

Now were like, "Fuckin' blackberries!" You can't get rid of them and they take over everything in a matter of weeks. It's a constant battle of ripping them out of the earth with the tractor when I can, spraying them with copious amounts of Round-Up when necessary, or burning them. Doesn't matter. All it takes is one bird, one pooped-out seed and it starts all over again.

At least they're tasty. They're the really big and plump Himalayan variety and they are considered an invasive species. The thorns are like razor wire.
Yeah, we had to wear denim head to toe when we went trout fishing in Oregon. Really sucks when a vine wraps around your ankle and it does its best impression of a cable saw on the front of your ankle.