You know you are in Iraq when….

[Seamonkey]

.. .a Cadillac is no longer something you drive.
… the water you drink is warmer than the water you shower with
…Salsa dancing in PT gear is risqué
…you have more AAFES pogs in your pocket than change
…the only fashion statement you can make is changing the color of your reflective belt
…you have Predators checking your six o’clock
…it rains one hundredth of an inch and the place floods
…you can outrun traffic on foot
…your barber is the same guy who cleans your toilet
…your clothes go to the laundry “Large” and come back “Small”
…the best pick up line you’ve got is “I’ve got a vehicle”
…you dry your hands with toilet paper before every meal
…someone jumps out from behind a barrier with a flashlight and tells you to take your hands out of your pocket
…you buy Italian gold from a Sri Lankan working in a Kuwaiti gold shop in the middle of Iraq.
…you check to see if your flood insurance cover you while here
…all your neighbors drive white pickup trucks.
…all your neighbors are truly “trailer trash”
…your window opens to a picturesque scene of sandbags
…your 6:00 AM wake up call is “Boom … Alarm Red, Alarm Red, Alarm Red”
…you are more worried about your socks showing while in PT gear then getting hit by a mortar
…the grass is always greener, but you still wouldn’t want to be on the other side of the fence
…you see a guy in full battle gear driving a Humvee trying not to spill his latte
…you are watching a “chick flick” with 300 other guys with machine guns
…you live in a gated community and your home is still a trailer.


I got this awhile back, feel free to add your own "special" memories...

[RobertB]

…the grass is always greener, but you still wouldn’t want to be on the other side of the fence You have grass?!?!? [Shock]

[jerrymrc]

I did DS 1. A few from the memory bank.

Burning flesh does not smell like BBQ.
Your stuff comes back from laundry and has a stronger smell of Diesel than when it went in.
Your shower water smells like diesel.
The street lights are on and it is noon.
You drink sterilized water because the last batch of bottled water has WAY too much salt in it.
The french you learned in HS comes in handy
Your thankful to be in a trailer and out of the tent.
Desert clothes my ass. these things are hot as hell (first gen chocolate chip)
If the M1/Bradly is burning 100 yards is NOT far enough away but it makes for some serious fireworks.

Just off the top of my head.

[DocMedic]

…you have more AAFES pogs in your pocket than change

UGH! Did you know that have to fill a gift certificate for EACH one of those damn pogs. I Say I have a $100 dollars worth of those damn pogs because of that BS.

[Quib]

[/LIST] You have grass?!?!? [Shock]

LOL.......when I was over in Iraq during Desert Storm, we often from a distance spotted what appeared to be nice soft green fields of grass. As we slowly approached these oddly placed fields of grass, the view quickly changed.

What appeared from a distance to be a field of grass, ended up being one blade of grass per square inch of sand!

[Byte Stryke]

…you buy Italian gold from a Sri Lankan working in a Kuwaiti gold shop in the middle of Iraq.Shouldn't that be Turkish Gold?



What appeared from a distance to be a field of grass, ended up being one blade of grass per square inch of sand!

So what you're saying is they had a thick lawn?

:D

I think I spent too much time over there...
Sometimes I miss it.

One more to add

Women that you wouldn't have given a second look at, now look good.
[Beer]

[Quib]

So what you're saying is they had a thick lawn?

:D

LOL.....by their standards, I guess so.

[Irving]

…someone jumps out from behind a barrier with a flashlight and tells you to take your hands out of your pocket

What is this one about please?

[Chris2087]

Quote:
…someone jumps out from behind a barrier with a flashlight and tells you to take your hands out of your pocket
What is this one about please?

Well we went to war, and garrison broke out.

Meaning someone is more concerned with reflective belts and making sure that your hands are out of your pockets then if you have a magizine in your gun...

speaking of which, why carry the gun in your PTs and not have ammo or kit? Just a fancy club then?

[Scanker19]

Every time I wore my PTs and had my M9 with me I felt like the guys at the end of pulp fiction.

[Irving]

I still don't understand. Are you not allowed to put your hands into your pockets as some part of the military regiment or something? Some arbitrary thing to keep troops following some kind of orders?

[jerrymrc]

I still don't understand. Are you not allowed to put your hands into your pockets as some part of the military regiment or something?

Yes. It is called "pocket pool". You are only to put your hands in your pockets to retrieve something.

[SA Friday]

[/list]One more to add

Women that you wouldn't have given a second look at, now look good.[Beer]
The 2-8-2 effect...

[Scanker19]

it sounds weird without idling engines.

you can google map your CHU.

[ChadAmberg]

I did DS 1. A few from the memory bank.

Burning flesh does not smell like BBQ.
Your stuff comes back from laundry and has a stronger smell of Diesel than when it went in.
Your shower water smells like diesel.
The street lights are on and it is noon.
You drink sterilized water because the last batch of bottled water has WAY too much salt in it.
The french you learned in HS comes in handy
Your thankful to be in a trailer and out of the tent.
Desert clothes my ass. these things are hot as hell (first gen chocolate chip)
If the M1/Bradly is burning 100 yards is NOT far enough away but it makes for some serious fireworks.

Just off the top of my head.


I was in Shield and Storm, and want to add:
If you wash your clothes in donated Evian because there is so much of it.
If you build furniture and dividers in your tent with cases of Evian...
If you're really pissed off at the admin flunkies, because they got the memo to trade in all their woodland camo for desert, and now there's none left for the folks who do the work.

[Pistol Packing Preacher]

Yes. It is called "pocket pool". You are only to put your hands in your pockets to retrieve something.


Military Intelligence...

Oxymoron...

[Coffee]

[Byte Stryke]

Well we went to war, and garrison broke out.

Meaning someone is more concerned with reflective belts and making sure that your hands are out of your pockets then if you have a magizine in your gun...

speaking of which, why carry the gun in your PTs and not have ammo or kit? Just a fancy club then?


Actually, it's supposed to be a strength conditioning exercise.
If you carry something kinda heavy around long enough when you carry your M4/M16/whatever it doesn't Seem to weigh as much.
when I was in I carried a 15# pipe on a sling full of concrete around for PT.
When I had to lug that damned 60 around on the DZ it didn't feel quite so heavy. :D

[Quib]

The constant carrying of a weapon, goes along with accountability.

Regardless of the uniform worn, whether PT or BDU, if a soldier is issued his weapon, he is accountable for it. Where he goes, it goes. Shit, shower or shave, your weapon is with you at all times.

[SA Friday]

The constant carrying of a weapon, goes along with accountability.

Regardless of the uniform worn, whether PT or BDU, if a soldier is issued his weapon, he is accountable for it. Where he goes, it goes. Shit, shower or shave, your weapon is with you at all times.
Hell, I thought it was just common sense [Coffee]

[Quib]

Hell, I thought it was just common sense [Coffee]

LOL.....well, for most it would be.

But as you probably know, you always have that one soldier who just so happens to leave his weapon unattended. And dang-it, if it isn't always the 1SG or SGM who stumbles upon that unsecured weapon! [Luck]