Of Wills and responsibility.

[jerrymrc]

I just went through 10 days of hell and I am here to give you a little public service announcement.

I do not care how old you are but unless you are living in your parents basement please get a will and someone you trust.

The short version. A good friend of mine and co worker went from fine to dead in 7 days. there was no will, there was the bad apt manager. there were the two sisters that came across the country for there brother but the policies were all to his children that (at first) would not step up to the plate even to put there father in the ground.

Because of all the rules and regulations these days we encountered roadblocks every step of the way.

I guess it is true that you find out who your friends are once your dead.

It was not pretty but in 2-1/2 days we got all the personal items packed into one car. The rest was taken to charity or split up between us two co-workers. The body is at a home waiting for transport back to his home and where the family is.

I took care of all the firearms and had I not done the things I did they might have all gone missing due to the apt mgr. We were able to take care of the sisters trip even without access to the bank accounts. The insurance and his accounts are now in the hands of his sons and I am staying out of the rest of it.

It still is all so surreal what has happened in the last couple of days.

Please get a will and at least one person you trust and put some things down on paper. Nobody ever plans for this and many put it off. I myself need to update mine.

[cstone]

Good advice. Sorry to hear about your adventure into the twilight zone but you survived and came away with some valuable insights.

Sounds like you could use a little R&R.

[Troublco]

I'll echo this...when my father passed away on Easter of last year, he left no will. Even though I was the only one close to him, both physically and emotionally, it was still a pain to deal with the estate. Do your family a favor; get at least a simple will.

[DeusExMachina]

An even better reason to buy NFA items, you're drafting your will while you're at it. :)

Sorry to hear about your troubles.

[Irving]

It sounds like you really stepped up to help out the family. You deserve a nice rest.

[StagLefty]

Good for you Jerry [Beer]
I started to think about this very topic this past summer. I added my son's name to all titles,which includes the mobile home we live in. Added his name to all bank accounts-he can get access to money after I'm gone. I also took care of final plans-all planned and paid for.
Hopefully these plans will take care of all the headaches you experienced.Bothered him more than me to do all this.

[Mobat555]

Kudos to you jerrymrc, you were a true friend to him.


I added my son's name to all titles,which includes the mobile home we live in. Added his name to all bank accounts-he can get access to money after I'm gone. I also took care of final plans-all planned and paid for.

From what I have heard this is one of the best ways to do things as you can avoid a ton of extra taxes for your beneficiaries. My father has a few friends who over the course of time found they had no family and very few friends. Once they started having medical issues they put my mom on all the stuff as she would take care of their animals indefinitely if something were to happen.

[Stinky]

My uncle passed away last Christmas, a year ago, from Cancer. He was in the hospital and my crazy-as@ cousin was doing the will. The doc says, get that thing signed immediately. There is a problem getting it to print, or something, and they can't get it printed, signed and notarized....the next am, he was in the next world.

Well, that was in CA...they then went into Probate and 45 days later they could get into the 4 other storage garages. There was ONE that had my cousin on the allowed entry list (THERE IS A LESSON THERE) I was w/them and we worked on one of em...just one, in a week. In the mean time, my cousin is away from TN trying to get this straight (the other cuz doesn't have a job). The one garage that he was current on...well they couldn't get into them due to probate. By the time probate was done, they we in a-rears on all the remaining ones. Something like $200 just to open the door and see what was in the unit. (they all came due when he was in the hospital).

My cousin, not the one from TN, was an issue. If we got into a unit before noon, we were doing good. So, we had less than 5 hours in the unit a day. My thinking was, get in grab the good stuff, or at least grab the stuff you might want, get it to your house and get the hell out of the unit. NOOOOOO, every morning we sorted out stuff, not really doing anything, just looking. sorting, thinking, pondering on how to sale this, that and the other thing. My way of thought was, leave at 6am, get it to the house (3 hours away) and get another load.

BTW, it was to the ceiling, and it started at the door. We found about 25 guns in there, any two, and for half of em, any one gun would pay for the storage.

So, at the end of the week, we sorted his apartment, took 2 PUs to the Goodwill, filled up the dumpster at the apartment...maybe twice, and got one storage unit cleared out. At the end of the week, we made the 3 hour trip to the crazy cuz's house (We were staying at a dif uncle's house....imposing). I had my Astro van F-U-L-L and towed a jeep trailer, w/4' side boards, they had a Toyota PU, and the dead uncle's full sized Chevy PU...that was all that we could get done in a week. I was thinking that it was about 2 days worth of work....OH Yeah, my cousin got a chunk taken out of his hand by a wild, crazy cat that we left in the apartment. He probably should have gone to the ER, but didn't.

All the other storage units went bad. They didn't want to offer the chance for good stuff to the local cousin (one who had the time to do it...and had access to a dump truck). So, there was, about, 25 motorcycles in one unit...supposedly a Jeep Commando (I think is what it is called, hard-top, V6) in one and I guarantee guns in each unit. The one that they know about, went at auction for $450.

Now, thank God, I wasn't really involved in it. I was just a flunky moving boxes. If I was doing my parents stuff, and my sisters were acting this way...I would have killed em. They really couldn't get moving in order to get anything done.

Get a will, give access to stuff to other people that don't really need access, while you are living and clean your junk out now...start now...unless you are a "Neat-Nick" ( a derogatory term for the type of person that is the exact opposite of a "Pack-Rat". BTW, also a derogatory term for a hoarder). And don't put stuff in dumb spots...put it in a bank, and give access to your kids, otherwise, it is wrong for a bank to let you in.

[jerrymrc]

That was one of the things in my thought process. Once the death notice is published then all bets are off.

Yes it was his family here but not the "next of kin". The people that could, helped in ways that were right by my friend. We got there trip paid for by the change in the apt and taking 300 or so DVD's to the second play store.

So in all we cleared everything out in about 24 hours after the death. I look forward to giving back the keys to the asswipe manager today. I think he believes everything is still there. We caught him poking around in the mans apt while he was in the hospital. Said he was spraying for bugs but he was looking for the firearms that I had removed the day earlier. :) They leave next friday back to the family.

[BlasterBob]

The Wife and I both had our wills completed about ten years ago. So, the will pretty well takes care of our possessions etc., and we have a power of attorney deal made with our kids doing the honors. Only squabble I can foresee is which one of the kids will WIN the opportunity to pull the plug on this old fart.
Better get your will all taken care of while it is still fresh in your mind.