View Full Version : You know your from Colorado when......
Colorado Osprey
04-28-2006, 08:09
You know you're from Colorado if:
1. You have absolutely no recognizable accent.
2. If the humidity gets above 25%, you consider it "muggy".
3. You are the third car to run a red light after it has changed.
4. You think only stupid people get lost in your town.
5. If it rains more than 2 days straight you compare the weather to
being in Seattle.
6. The only RTD bus you've been on is the 16th Street shuttle.
7. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike on top of your $500 car.
8. You think South Park" is a place to stop for gas on your way to the
mtns.
9. You get depressed after one day of foggy weather.
10. North means "mountains to the left;" south is "mountains to the
right; and east and west are where all those liberals keep moving in
from.
11. You go anywhere else on the planet and the air feels "sticky" and
you notice the sky is no longer blue.
12. You think gun control is a steady hand.
13. You can run up 10 flights of stairs without huffing and puffing.
14. You can drive over a 12,000 foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but cant
get to work if there are 4 inches of snow.
15. April showers bring May blizzards.
16. You know what a "rocky mountain oyster" is. But you dont know what
a "turn signal" is.
17. A bear on your front porch doesn't bother you nearly as much as a
Democrat in Congress does.
18. People from other states breathe 5 times as often as you do.
19. You've gone skiing in July. You've gone sunbathing in January. They
were both in the same year.
20. You never pack away your coat and sweaters.
21. You love your Broncos, your Avs, your Rockies, Nuggets - ok not the
Nuggets ... well you can't have everything.
22. If it snows in the morning you expect it to be gone by lunchtime.
23. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from
Colorado.
24. Your bumber sticker says, "Colorado is the home of Mountain men,
Not men mou***** men."
25. You climb a 14'er to smoke and drink to get the buzz back.
26. In Colorado those who live in Boulder aren't considered in Colorado's
reality.
27. You doesn't understand why Denver is Liberal.
28. There is a drought, yet you wonder why Denver area lakes can't be
touched for water usage.
29. Hunting is something you do to eat, not sport.
30. You turn on the heater at night and the AC on in the day.
31. You only lock up your hubs of the 4x4 after you get stuck.
32. You fly up and down mountain roads while the flatlanders are
grabbing onto the grab handles in the car.
33. You doen't even see the antelope on the side of the road
anymore....unless it's hunting season and you didn't get one.
34. You wait 3-4 years to get drawn for a deer tag.
35. You shoot 2-3 elk a year and the population is still at an all time high.
36. You like that out of state hunters to come here to hunt rabbits they
have to pay more in hunting liscence fees than you do to go to Texas to
hunt hogs.
37. You love to see the Strawberry Sunrise the morning after a storm.
38. You love to see the Purple/Orange Sunsets every evening..except 2
nights all year.
39. You love that every 3rd garage has a hot rod in it that is rust free
40. You know that even though it snows it rarely gets icey.
41. You know that when it rains it could include softball hail.
42. You like the fact that most of the time when the Rose Bowl parade is
on TV the weather is better in Colorado.
43. 80 degrees in January is common
44. Snow in the mountains on 4th of July is a given
45. The Pikes Peak Hill Climb will be delayed for snow during summer
46. When it finally rains, you need to be out of the low spots
47. You always have a jacket in the car
48. You keep a candle in your car, and it's not to be romantic.
49. Gunnison rivals Alaska for lowest temp in the nation.
50. 80-100 mile/hour winds are not a hurricane or tornado, just a
Chinook wind
51. You know where to find your trash can when the wind blows
52. You know where to find your BBQ when the wind blows
53. You know where you find that other stuff you'll also find your patio
funiture.
53. You love that you can make list like this!
2ndChildhood
04-28-2006, 08:17
Eat your heart out new york!!!
2C
JohnTRourke
04-28-2006, 08:57
Where the right lane is the fast lane.
Good list, all true
Native
Where the right lane is the fast lane.
Good list, all true
Native
Man that pisses me off to no end too!
Being from the East I still drive like a maniac.
If you haven't been in Colorado for 90% of your life...GO HOME!
If you haven't been in Colorado for 90% of your life...GO HOME!
I'm working on it. Only a few more years to go.
If you haven't been in Colorado for 90% of your life...GO HOME!
no.
2ndChildhood
04-28-2006, 10:46
If you haven't been in Colorado for 90% of your life...GO HOME!
Good luck!
Up here in the fort, a percentage of every group of incoming college students decides they _have to_ stay.
Myself, I'm a transplant from New Mexico so that gives me a pass [wink]
On the other hand as they used to say in NM back in the old days: "Texan go home!"
Colorado Osprey
04-28-2006, 10:51
Up here in Colorado we have a saying...."The reason we are kinda close but kinda far from Texas......a flush only goes so far."
I'm just glad we are up river on the Rio Grande, so our refuse goes away.
newracer
04-28-2006, 11:33
[
Up here in the fort, a percentage of every group of incoming college students decides they _have to_ stay.
I resemble that remark, but at least I came from the Co Springs to the Fort. I did move the the Springs from CA though. :oops: Moved with my parents when I was 13. About 64% has been in CO now though and I am never leaving. [poke]
Colorado Osprey
04-28-2006, 11:42
newracer....you can stay if you vote conservative...if not you will be deported as an illegal imigrant.
newracer
04-28-2006, 12:30
No problem- I like my guns so no liberal will ever get my vote.
newracer....you can stay if you vote conservative...if not you will be deported as an illegal imigrant.
I wanna stay!
Sometimes I vote Lib though, Libertarian that is. [poke]
Besides I live in the PRB and generally annoy all the hippies here, I like guns, dirt bikes and diesel trucks.
I hate tofu and patchouli.
Asha'man
04-28-2006, 13:39
newracer....you can stay if you vote conservative...if not you will be deported as an illegal imigrant.\
Because we see sooooo many illegal immigrants being deported. :roll:
One I've seen on similar Colorado lists: When at sea level, you breathe half as often as anyone else. :mrgreen:
Brian
If you haven't been in Colorado for 90% of your life...GO HOME!
I say if you weren't born here...go home!!
In fact, if you and your daddy weren't born here..go home....
Well...as long as I am on a roll....if you your daddy and your grandpa weren't born here...go home...
Of coarse, I must stop there..... now my daughter might even say "great grandpa"
-Dana
The1andOnlyKC
04-30-2006, 16:00
But but but my babbies daddy and mommy were born here....
well maybe, just maybe I was a bit harsh...
I've been here since 1970 and I've seen this state take a downward spiral with all the people coming here from CA and TX. I probably wouldn't be so bad if they didn't want to screw up this state the way they did of their own.
then they always spew the same old crap "oh its so much better in ____ (insert state here)" well if it's so much better, GO BACK!
JohnTRourke
04-30-2006, 16:59
I always have a saying for those transplants who want to ruin this state like they ruined their own (and they never see the connection, anybody else notice that?)
We were doing fine before you got here and we'll be doing fine after you leave. [poke]
chain.60
04-30-2006, 17:27
If you haven't been in Colorado for 90% of your life...GO HOME!
I AGREE [usa]
PsychoI3oy
05-01-2006, 02:54
Well. I came here from California (by way of a couple years in Michigan) and think it's much better here than it was there.
No smog, traffic, and a lot less retared liberals (Boulder makes Berkely look almost sane).
Trust me when I say there's no smog or traffic here. The bay area may have nice weather, but that's about it. $3.25 gas and $5 packs of cigarettes (and $1000/mo rent for single bedroom apartments) can kiss my left butcheek. Don't get me started on the rediculous gun laws (though I moved out during the national AWB and wasn't there when teh governator was voted in and made the .50 ban-- not to mention didn't really start getting into guns till out ere).
I'm staying here wether you natives like it or not.
Some of my favorites:
"Go back to Texas, and take a Californian with you"
"Since its tourist season, where do I get my huntin license?"
Ok. Kicking out ALL of the non-natives is maybe a little harsh. They should all just have to live in Highlands and NEVER be allowed to drive in the Mountains.....
-Dana
chain.60
05-01-2006, 14:57
Some of my favorites:
"Go back to Texas, and take a Californian with you"
"Since its tourist season, where do I get my huntin license?"
Ok. Kicking out ALL of the non-natives is maybe a little harsh. They should all just have to live in BOULDER and NEVER be allowed to drive. :twisted:
-Dana
Dana, fixed it for you.
:mrgreen: Bill
JohnTRourke
05-01-2006, 16:08
Some of my favorites:
"Go back to Texas, and take a Californian with you"
"Since its tourist season, where do I get my huntin license?"
Ok. Kicking out ALL of the non-natives is maybe a little harsh. They should all just have to live in BOULDER and NEVER be allowed to drive. :twisted:
-Dana
Dana, fixed it for you.
:mrgreen: Bill
Wait wait wait.
I live in Boulder county.
Why should they be here?
They shoudl be forced to live someplace nice. Like Aurora. Or Limon. (or Cheyenne Wells, bahahahahaahah)
You know, great thing about Montana, 30 below keeps the riffraff out. :twisted:
I picked HR because they want it to be a mini california...so let them live there.
-Dana
JohnTRourke
05-01-2006, 17:20
Why should the dumb butt liberals get the pretty parts? Let them have the working parts. Commerce City sounds like an excellent choice.
I mean, if we're going to make rules, let's make some RULES. :P
chain.60
05-01-2006, 17:23
Boulder is more Kalif. than Kalif.
You know like trail mix Fruits, Nuts,
and Flakes. [greenbann] [dance1]
Sorry Brian , but facts are facts.
By the way I grew up at the [sink]
Bill
JohnTRourke
05-01-2006, 17:50
Oh, I agree that Boulder has MOOOORE than it's fair share of fruits and nuts.
But since we are making rules about where californian's can stay., we should make them go out someplace nice.
Maybe alamosa, there's a nice town. Or Craig, there's a nice town. Or Rangely.
I mean, why should they get to be on the front range.
Let them work for it.
Besides, 30 years ago, Boulder was a nice place. Heck, even 20 years ago it wasn't bad. now, it's a lost cause.
Colorado Osprey
05-01-2006, 19:31
This post has been Hi-jacked
chain.60
05-01-2006, 20:25
About time someone notice.
[roll] [roll] [roll] [roll]
JohnTRourke
05-01-2006, 20:35
It wasn't hijacked
It fell off the truck.
I just found them laying in the street. :cool:
I get to add one.
You know your in BOULDER when;
The lady on the trail above you is crying because she is not sure the tree she wants to hug is going to accept her.
I'm not joking either. It happend to my family and I. We were in the little park at the intersection of Old Stagecoach road and Lefthand canyon rd.
There was 20 of them and some weird dude in a white robe. They all met for a bit then started walking to trees. They put their hands up like the trees were hot, then started toughing them. Eventually, they hugged them. I was taking a leak on a tree and happend to turn around to hear some lady crying about 20' behind me (no they couldn't see me). Another lady comes up and tells her to go ahead, it will be ok. The tree will accept you! I watched a minute. The lady would go up and put her hands up, then step back. She was totally serious that the tree wasn't going to take her..... I wanted to [roll] my butt off.
I loaded the family up and left asap...
Greg
OK. The get back on Topic.
I will add to the list.
You know your from Colorado when...
"You can find the Valley Highway and the Boulder Turnpike on a map"
(or know where they are when someone talks about them)
"You can drive in the snow without 4WD"
"You know that Golden was the Capital and not just the home of Coors"
"You actually know what that big "M" is for when you drive to the mountains"
"You know that Central city isn't a theme park built around casinos"
The list could go on.
-Dana
I thought I was kinda back on topic..... Well close anyway...
KarlPMann
05-03-2006, 20:01
I'm 44, and I've been here 36 years. I AM NOT LEAVING!!! :P Karl. [roll]
HunterCO
05-03-2006, 20:02
I'm 44, and I've been here 36 years. I AM NOT LEAVING!!! :P Karl. [roll]
come on now don't lie I thinks it more like 144. [poke]
KarlPMann
05-03-2006, 20:07
Now where's that damn button? :twisted: Karl.
JohnTRourke
05-03-2006, 20:14
dang johnny come latelies come in here like they own the place.
9 years old or not
get out
We have rules
It's Craig or Texas for you. :twisted:
chain.60
05-03-2006, 20:44
If you didn't ride the trollies from Golden to Fits. you
are a Newcomer. [usa]
Bill
folks make me feel bad, left CA 13 years ago and not going back. Wish there were jobs in my field in WY, I would never have left. See, some of the CA migrants are actually refugees. :)
I keep wondering whwnver the mass layoffs happen where I'd end up. I hope here, Idaho or texas but never know. Suppose after a year LFW I'd consider CA but would have to leave a safe with family here...
You know you are in WY when: (slightly modifed)
* The wind is faster than your truck!
* You own more than four pairs of gloves
* Every other vehicle is a 4x4
* The sun goes down, you start looking for your coat.
* In March your vehicle is 43% mud.
* You leave your keys in your car and the next morning it's still there.
* Wolves are naturally free and house cats are on a leash.
* The elevation exceeds the population.
* Monday night football starts at 7:00, instead of 9:00.
* The jug of milk on your porch is frozen.
* You've broken down on the highway and somebody stops to help you.
* You can pay for six "Big Macs" with a personal check.
* Drive by shootings only happen on the evening news.
* There's a Bison in your lane.
* Your central heating system is fueled by large logs.
* You can see the stars at night.
* People drive 200 miles to shop in a real mall.
* The term "chill factor" is part of daily vocabulary.
* The bumper jack in your pickup will lift a house.
* You only paid $5.00 to cut your own Douglas Fir Christmas tree.
* Your backyard smells like sage brush.
* You put on a pair of snowboots to get the morning paper. (in may)
* You enjoy a hot chocolate more than a margarita.
* You put the car heater on your list of best friends.
* You slept through the night unawakened by a siren.
* A rodeo is more popular than a Madonna concert
If you didn't ride the trollies from Golden to Fits. you
are a Newcomer. [usa]
Bill
Wasn't that when Fred Flintstone was paddling around?
I got here in 74, when was that?
Thread hijacks are cool....
I like the WY one, kind of makes me want to move there..... Some of my friends like it up there too.
chain.60
05-04-2006, 16:35
If you didn't ride the trollies from Golden to Fits. you
are a Newcomer. [usa]
Bill
Wasn't that when Fred Flintstone was paddling around?
I got here in 74, when was that?
Thread hijacks are cool....
I like the WY one, kind of makes me want to move there..... Some of my friends like it up there too.
Back in the 40s&50s Lived in Golden And would ridethe street cars to
Fits. to see my grandfather on the weekends.
That was almost as good as riding a steam train .
Bill
I've done time with the .mil at Fitzsimons AMC, Lowry AFB and Buckly ANG base!
And while I'm feeling old... I did time at Ft. Ord (hence the 7idl), Treasure Island, Alameda NAS.
...You remember the Big Thompson Flood.
JohnTRourke
05-04-2006, 19:44
...You remember the Big Thompson Flood.
I'm not that old (despite appearances) and I totally remember that. That was amazing, the power of that and the total destruction And then for years up into the mid 1980's you would drive up the canyon going to Estes and checking out the damage that still wasn't fixed years afterwards. I remember driving up the canyon in 1989 and still seeing spots.
probably time for another of those to happen, too many people building in canyons and not paying attention
BTW, when you are a native, you just call it Estes, you don't need the Park, everyone knows where you are talking about. Unless you are a furriner. :P
I remember the flight of 6 Hueys flying over the house, and wondering what was up. I went through the canyon a couple of years back, and saw a few thing that couldn't have been done by anything other than alot of water.
Asha'man
05-04-2006, 22:29
If you didn't ride the trollies from Golden to Fits. you
are a Newcomer. [usa]
Bill
I'm a native, but I have no clue what you're talking about. :mrgreen:
Brian
76 I believe?
I was 10 I think.
Can I stay, hu hu hu?????
Or was this NOT a test....
KarlPMann
05-06-2006, 21:30
...You remember the Big Thompson Flood.
My sister was a "flagman" on the road construction crew after the flood. We drove through a few times just after and saw all the devastation. :cry: Karl.
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