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Bailey Guns
08-05-2012, 09:13
DISCLAIMER: I love my wife. I'm as happily married as any man can realistically expect to be. My wife is probably the smartest woman I've ever met.

OK...now that that's outta the way...

My wife's been wanting to go to IKEA. She seems to think I'd like to go to IKEA with her. I really don't know why she'd think that. I narrowly avoided having to stop by there when we were in town a week or so ago.

I thought she was over it. I was wrong.

This morning she's looking through the latest IKEA catalog. Then she makes a phone call. Then she asks me, "Would you be really disappointed if I asked Susan to to to IKEA with me instead of going with you?"

Women...even the really smart ones can come up with some pretty stupid stuff some times. At any rate, I think that's God's way of letting me know he's got my back.

hghclsswhitetrsh
08-05-2012, 09:24
Two questions:

Did she take the truck?
How well can Susan put furniture together?

Bailey Guns
08-05-2012, 09:33
Two questions:

Did she take the truck?
How well can Susan put furniture together?

Two answers:

Not my truck! She has a Traverse. Lots of room.
OK...I'll probably get stuck putting whatever she buys into useable form. But that's better than having to actually go there. I'll take that tradeoff any day.

hghclsswhitetrsh
08-05-2012, 09:35
Wow I really need to proof read...

Mama Bear
08-05-2012, 09:39
This made me laugh! I too wanted to go to the ikea and was shut down by cofi. God was probably in my favor too since I later realized I would have to put the stuff together myself not because he didnt want to but because he is umm challenged when it comes to following directions to put stuff together.

Bailey Guns
08-05-2012, 09:54
Do you have any idea how much work men get out of because they "can't follow directions" or they're "not doing it right" or various other reasons?

I don't, either, but it's a lot.

The quickest way to not get asked to do something again is to do it differently than how the woman wants you to do it.

Irving
08-05-2012, 09:59
There exists a user manual for women. It has never been opened.

Skully
08-05-2012, 10:52
There exists a user manual for women. It has never been opened.

[ROFL1][ROFL2]

The problem with the manual is Hispanic women consider it a "works in progress" so always changing the instructions

What most men that have never been to IKEA is unaware of, yes women can take hours in IKEA but they sell food and drinks there, the Swedish meatballs is the bomb and there is a bar across the street. [Beer]

sniper7
08-05-2012, 10:54
Good luck if she buys furniture other than storage items.

The couches/chairs are made for "little people". I'm 6'1 and feel like I'm going to hit terminal velocity before my ass makes contact with a cushion.

the storage type stuff is just your typical cheap wood, easy to put together, seems like it will last but definitely not high quality multi-lifetime furniture.

I'm glad you got out of going. It is a zoo and I just get pissed at the people that can't follow the damn arrows. I have had to go 1 time and that was the last time.

Bailey Guns
08-05-2012, 10:59
Yeah...she's looking for a small storage cabinet thing for quilting fabric. It won't get anything close to heavy use.

Regardless...I don't have to go. I've heard their meatballs are good...but it won't break my heart if I don't get to eat meatballs from a furniture store.

sniper7
08-05-2012, 11:05
Yeah...she's looking for a small storage cabinet thing for quilting fabric. It won't get anything close to heavy use.

Regardless...I don't have to go. I've heard their meatballs are good...but it won't break my heart if I don't get to eat meatballs from a furniture store.

You could toss out the "guilt card" and tell her you were looking forward to those meatballs and have her bring some home[Tooth]

Skully
08-05-2012, 11:05
Yeah...she's looking for a small storage cabinet thing for quilting fabric. It won't get anything close to heavy use.

Regardless...I don't have to go. I've heard their meatballs are good...but it won't break my heart if I don't get to eat meatballs from a furniture store.


They are a full service introduction to Swedish food, have her bring you back a pack of meatballs, my wife did along with some Swedish cookies, sesame bread etc. :)

Irving
08-05-2012, 11:06
've heard their meatballs are good...but it won't break my heart if I don't get to eat meatballs from a furniture store.

That's funny. When I used to work at Medved, I would go next door and eat at the antique store because they had good sandwiches.

rondog
08-05-2012, 11:29
but they sell food and drinks there, the Swedish meatballs is the bomb and there is a bar across the street. [Beer]

Well now! I do need a new reading lamp and some bookshelves......do they offer golf carts to get around that giant friggin' place?

Bailey Guns
08-05-2012, 11:30
All this talk about Swedish stuff...

The first girl I ever asked to "go steady" was Swedish. We were in 5th grade at the American School of Algiers. Her name was Helena Ehrenstråhle. Her dad was the Swedish ambassador to Algiers.

I loved going to her house (the Swedish embassy) because they always had stuff there that we couldn't get on the local market...good ice cream, chewing gum, etc... This was probably in the 1968-1970 time-frame.

Zundfolge
08-05-2012, 13:08
OK...I'll probably get stuck putting whatever she buys into useable form. But that's better than having to actually go there. I'll take that tradeoff any day.
Dude, you do realize there's food at Ikea, and places to sit and eat food and drink ... if you got dragged there at least you could sit in the restaurant or bistro eating Swedish Meatballs while the Mrs schleps around the place ... hell the hot dog and a coke is like a buck and a half! (if only they also served Påsköl)

Now you're going to end up having to put together the furniture WITHOUT getting any of the spoils (not even a bag of Swedish Fish) So all the pain, none of the gain. [Shake]

Bailey Guns
08-05-2012, 13:36
Dude, you do realize there's food at Ikea, and places to sit and eat food and drink ... if you got dragged there at least you could sit in the restaurant or bistro eating Swedish Meatballs while the Mrs schleps around the place ... hell the hot dog and a coke is like a buck and a half! (if only they also served Påsköl)

Now you're going to end up having to put together the furniture WITHOUT getting any of the spoils (not even a bag of Swedish Fish) So all the pain, none of the gain. [Shake]

Sorry, Z... You don't know my wife. A) She'll bring me meatballs anyway...she's just like that. B) She's the best cook I've ever met and I have the physique to prove it. If the meatballs are that good she'll make it her life's work to make something even better.

Either way, I don't have to drive 120 miles round trip to fight traffic and crowds to go to a place I have zero interest in going to. No...putting together some piece of wooden furniture is a small price to pay for that victory.

Troublco
08-05-2012, 14:20
Fortunately for me (and my bank account), I managed to put about 400 miles between my wife and Ikea before it opened...[ROFL1]

WETWRKS
08-05-2012, 14:56
Guys...we don't have it here in the US yet but ikea is planning on beer at their stores. Swedish meatballs, beer....don't have to shop, wife happy...talk our way into more firearms....might be worth it. Just saying.

BigDee
08-05-2012, 15:20
Ikea furniture is great if you are decorating a dorm room. Anything else no way. It's a bunch of particle board garbage.

theGinsue
08-05-2012, 19:23
My last active duty assignment was just outside of Boston. Before leaving this house (rented it out while we were gone), my wife had us dump the couch & recliner.

Needing new living room furniture In MA, we trekked up to New Hampshire to find new stuff.

We must have hit 1/2 dozen places and they all had neat little cafe type food bars inside (probably for all of the husbands that get drug along). Of course, my wife was on a mission and expected me at her side to give my opinions (which she mostly ignored) so I never got to try any of those furniture store cafe's out.

All in all, I think Carl dodged a bullet on this one.

Bailey Guns
08-05-2012, 20:27
I was beginning to think I know where a lot of forum members hang out.

20X11
08-05-2012, 20:44
Went to IKEA for the first time a few weeks back...have no idea what any of the furniture was like...I was too busy trying to figure out where in the store I was and how I'd get the F out of there if I had too. Most confusing freakin' store I've ever been to. They want you to "follow the yellow brick road" around that freakin' place. Even the wife was EXTREMELY uncomfortable.

Mtn.man
08-05-2012, 20:47
WTF is IKEA?

theGinsue
08-05-2012, 20:56
Swedish furniture you put together. Really popular stuff but for the life of me, I can't figure out why.

Personally, I see it as high end college dormitory stuff, but the price tag on their stuff is high!

jerrymrc
08-05-2012, 21:14
WTF is IKEA?

Thank You. Now that said.
Swedish furniture you put together. Really popular stuff but for the life of me, I can't figure out why.

Personally, I see it as high end college dormitory stuff, but the price tag on their stuff is high!

This is not a Swedish thing. Everything I bought in Belgium in 1981-84 was like that. I first saw that "Pin and twist lock" here in the states in the mid 90's. Brought on flashbacks. [Flower]

JoeT
08-05-2012, 21:53
Guys, save the trip... I can sell you their meatballs (we sell them to them), so there's no other reason to go

T-Jet
08-05-2012, 23:19
I'll probably get stuck putting whatever she buys into useable form.


Yeah - but if you do it totally wrong then you'll never be asked to do it again. Problem solved.

GilpinGuy
08-06-2012, 00:27
There exists a user manual for women. It has never been opened.

Here it is:
http://i1018.photobucket.com/albums/af308/juanez3248/Women101.jpg

MrPrena
08-06-2012, 00:32
I actually really like going to IKEA over any other furniture stores. I can save TONS of $$$$ by going to IKEA over Scandinavian design. [ROFL1]

Graves
08-06-2012, 00:34
Two questions:

Did she take the truck?
How well can Susan put furniture together?

Truck? Everything they sell seems to fit in a gawdamn 2'x5' box.


BTW Gilpin, that's just vol. 1-3.95 there.

jreifsch80
08-06-2012, 00:50
i've only been to an ikea once and that was one in prague when i lived there. their stuff is crappy, reminded me of the communist era cheap used furniture that i had in my apartment there lol though they did serve pilsner urquell there ;)

Not_A_Llama
08-06-2012, 07:07
Walk through IKEA with a reloader's eye, and you'll probably end up with more purchases than the wife. It's terrifying/amazing.

The furniture is typically decent stuff, and cheap. It's not for old dudes living in mountain compounds, trying to will it three generations down.