Log in

View Full Version : MSDS for women



anaphylaxis
08-30-2012, 22:04
[LOL]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET
Workplace Hazardous Materials Information System
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Substance: Woman
Chemical System: Wo
Manufacturer: God
Typical Size: Average weight 115 lbs.; specimens can vary
from 90 to over 200 lbs.
Occurrence: Large quantities found in urban areas and
shopping malls.


PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
--------------------

1. Surface Tension--soft and warm.
2. Exposed surfaces usually cosmetically enhanced.
3. Boils at nothing.
4. Freezes without reason.
5. Melts with special reason.
6. Flavor initially sweet, becomes bitter if used incorrectly.
7. Found in various states of purity from virgin metal to common ore.
8. Yields to pressure applied to specific points.
9. Sometimes enlarges alarminly with age.
10. Even brief linking with male substance can cause substance to
reproduce with marked physical and mental changes.


CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
--------------------

1. Has affinity for gold, silver, and precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. Highly volatile for reasons not clearly understood.
4. Verbal activity greatly increased by alcohol saturation.
5. Most powerful money-reducing agent known (See HAZARDS, #3)


COMMON USES:
------------

1. Highly ornamental.
2. Relatively brief exposure can be a great aid to relaxation.
3. Pleasurable companion until legally owned.


SUBSTANCE VERIFICATION:
-----------------------

1. Pure specimen turns bright pink when observed in natural state.
2. Turns green when compared to better specimen.


HAZZARDS:
---------

1. May explode spontaneously without cause.
2. Illegal to possess more than one specimen at a time.
3. Avoid specimen contact with plastic credit cards.

sniper7
08-30-2012, 23:32
nice![Beer]

Mr_RoP
08-30-2012, 23:34
I like it! Going to share with the wife!

anaphylaxis
08-30-2012, 23:42
I like it! Going to share with the wife!

I'd recommend against that...

hghclsswhitetrsh
08-30-2012, 23:42
Sad... But true...

T-Giv
08-30-2012, 23:44
Preach it!

anaphylaxis
08-30-2012, 23:45
Sad... But true...

Yup.

These days, 85% of my money is expended on guns, aviation, alcohol or vacations.... The rest is wasted!

GilpinGuy
08-30-2012, 23:45
My wife will kill me when she reads this tomorrow AM. Hahahahahaha![ROFL1]

Ronin13
08-30-2012, 23:46
I like it! Going to share with the wife!

Hope she has a sense of humor...
Vegas odds that Brandon is sleeping on the couch tonight: 1,000,000:1. [Luck]

Mr_RoP
08-30-2012, 23:46
She laughed! My wife isnt the typical MSDS woman and thats why I married her!

anaphylaxis
08-30-2012, 23:49
She laughed! My wife isnt the typical MSDS woman and thats why I married her!

Where would I find one like her... What is this "sense of humor" thing that you refer to?

Mr_RoP
08-30-2012, 23:51
Damn I will take those odds! She is right next to me, well next to the baby thats next to me on the bed. I am happy with my square foot of bed as it is better than the couch in the man cave!

Mr_RoP
08-30-2012, 23:54
I took the last one with that sense of humor trait. Yup, I am selfish like that!

BPTactical
08-31-2012, 10:23
She laughed! My wife isnt the typical MSDS woman and thats why SHE KEEPS ME

Fixed it for you Brandon.

Mr_RoP
08-31-2012, 10:26
Yeah! That's more close to the truth I am sure! She puts up with so much of my s**t lol !

meatman
08-31-2012, 10:55
Do I need to put that in the big yellow binder here at work? [ROFL1]

BPTactical
08-31-2012, 11:06
Do I need to put that in the big yellow binder here at work? [ROFL1]

Do ya feel lucky?
Well do ya?
[ROFL1]

45XD
08-31-2012, 18:15
Brilliant!

Tinelement
08-31-2012, 19:58
That's funny right thar!!