View Full Version : shoplifting.
Just got back from the security dept at JCPenny's. My 15 year old daughter just got busted shoplifting $120.00 worth of makeup. Like I don't have enough problems already...
Anybody been down this road before? Do I need to get a lawyer? This is the first time she's ever gotten into trouble outside of grades at school, but that was just with us at home. So I have no idea if this can come off her record, I'd really like to avoid this impacting her ability to get a job or an apt when the times comes. Or is this no big deal? I know she has a court date but don't know anything else at this time. I'll start doing some research on my own asap but if you can be a help, I'd like to hear it.
If you have any advice or if anyone wants to trade a boy who's into sports for the daughter they never had, let me know.
In my experience with the law and the judicial system, you can never go wrong at least spending a couple hundred dollars having a consult with a lawyer. They should be able to get rid of some of the "fog-of-war" especially so you know what to expect in the proceedings. You can then decide for yourself whether or not you can handle it without being represented. You can also decide the level of representation. If you don't need them to be right next to you in court, you can tell them that you got it (and save the 400 dollars an hour and mileage), and just have them do paperwork or have them available for an occasional e-mail with questions (yeah they charge by the 10th of an hour).
Having 4 children myself, I probably would do my best to ensure the consequences of her actions, education at this point is probably the best, perhaps gather some job applications from local establishments to show her that businesses routinely do and can ask if you have ever been arrested/convicted of a crime. "If you and someone else are asking for the same job, and you answer that question with yes, and the other person has not been arrested/convicted of a crime, who would you hire?" Same thing with renting an apartment.
A lone city misdemeanor on someone's record even in adult years (I still hold a security clearance) probably won't have too much impact. However, if she continues down that road, things could get worse.
Just my .02 I'm not a lawyer, but have been around the block I guess.
scratchy
03-16-2013, 19:19
Make sure the kid pays for the lawyer too. Work, chores, however it's appropriate. No free pass.
Kraven251
03-16-2013, 19:29
Do you and your daughter a favor, get a lawyer. Molly F. Jansen is a good person to contact. Even if she won't be able to help you out herself, she will happily send you to someone that deals more with these kinds of cases.
Judges tend to like working with lawyers over private citizens.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 19:42
Was she arrested or just detained? big difference. You mention court date but nothing about an actual charge.
1st offense? I bet she will get a differd sentence...
Detained by Penny's, not officially arrested I guess, I don't really know. She didn't get hauled down to the police dept, just held at Panny's. We did get an official Summons to report to Court. She was released to us since she's only 15. Yup, already confiscated all her makeup and threw it away, and let her know she's paying the whole damn thing out of her Christmas/B-Day stash which is fairly considerable for a kid. I'll probably call a few lawyers on Monday.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 19:57
She wasn't arrested [in the long run] it's no big deal. I'd consult with a loyer;) Sounds like one of those stay out of trouble for 1 year, appearance tickets.
Still confused how can she get a summons if there was no 'Official" Police involvement.
Good life lesson. Been down this road and it really helped teach them about honesty. Most anything the happens before they are 18, you can get exponged (spell??) so it doesnt become a permenant stain. I had to do this for mine for one offense after she went through probation
They key is to make sure they learn rather than putting her in a box so she can hate you.
Did the police respond to the loss prevention office and issue her a misdemeanor ticket for theft? Or did the LP personnel issue you a Civil Demand notice and release her to your custody?
It sounds like she was ticketed because you stated that you were given a court date. If that is the case, depending on her age and final court verdict or plea arrangement, then it will be documented on her record.
Don't assume this is the first time, just first time caught. I would come down like at hammer at home, make the legal side the small side. Need to break the pattern at all costs before it gets out of hand.
This is said from the perspective of both being a parent now but also being that kid once upon a time.
Good Luck!
Jim, She was busted by Pennys security and there was a Westminster police officer there having us fill out paperwork but all the wife and I have is a "Municipal summons and Complaint" that tells us she has a manditory appearance at court. That's all I know. I was sort of in shock and didn't think to ask all these questions when I went to mall security to pick her up. I feel dumb now but at the time I wasn't thinking. No ticket was issued.
Sat in on an intervention of a 12yo recently (not mine). Busted for shoplifting (Mom turned him in). The judge went this route. Sitting in front of the people he stole from definitely had an effect on the kid. Sounds like he went through enough hassle and inconvenience to at least think twice before he does it again.
Good luck.
Jim, She was busted by Pennys security and there was a Westminster police officer there having us fill out paperwork but all the wife and I have is a "Municipal summons and Complaint" that tells us she has a manditory appearance at court. That's all I know. I was sort of in shock and didn't think to ask all these questions when I went to mall security to pick her up. I feel dumb now but at the time I wasn't thinking.
Happened with me, It is basically a ticket and notice to appear in court. That is where the city attorney will decide if they want to prosecute or whatever.
BPTactical
03-16-2013, 20:31
She will go to court, judge will offer a deferred sentence upon completion of classes and fines, charges dropped after 6 months of being a good girl.
Hey Bert, Classes & fines huh? Any ideas what that intails? Dollar amounts? I have no idea.
I'm gonna go beat somebody, I'm off for the night. Thanks everyone for the insights and ideas, I do appreciate it
She will go to court, judge will offer a deferred sentence upon completion of classes and fines, charges dropped after 6 months of being a good girl.
This. Assuuming this has NEVER happened before. Its was not a large ammount of moneys worth.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 20:40
Hey Bert, Classes & fines huh? Any ideas what that intails? I have no idea.
Cash, cash, cash, then some more cash. You daughter will be in debt for 1-2 yrs depending what kind of employment she can get.
You want to get her attention, NO Cell Phone, No Internet other than school required items. It's amazing how quickly you get their attention when you disable their lifeline / social network.
The flip side is IF you come down too hard on her, it might make matters worse. been there, done that with our daughter. 2nd time her phone (no cell at the time) privileges were cut it was like a bolt of lightning hit her.
They will issue an ammount of community service. Fines could vary.
Bailey Guns
03-16-2013, 20:42
It's never a bad idea to have an attorney. Having said that, you'll probably do just as well with this incident as far as court goes without that expense. Talk to the city attorney. After your first meeting with the city attorney you can always decide to hire legal counsel if you don't get what you consider to be fair treatment. But realistically, he/she wants this to go away with as little time/effort/expense as much as you do. Try to get a deferred judgment. That means she has to face consequences but there's also a reward for paying for her mistake. She'll most likely be required to pay a fine and/or restitution and have to perform some kind of community service and check in with a probation officer or city equivalent. The catch is, and this is the important part, if she keeps her nose clean and completes all the court-ordered requirements, the charge "goes away", so to speak. If she doesn't there will be further consequences.
Cash, cash, cash, then some more cash. You daughter will be in debt for 1-2 yrs depending what kind of employment she can get.
You want to get her attention, NO Cell Phone, No Internet other than school required items. It's amazing how quickly you get their attention when you disable their lifeline / social network.
The flip side is IF you come down too hard on her, it might make matters worse. been there, done that with our daughter. 2nd time her phone (no cell at the time) privileges were cut it was like a bolt of lightning hit her.
Jim has an amazing point. I'm young also (21) I have seen a lot of people get in trouble and the parents come down way to hard off the bat and then there is resentment and they want nothing to do with you. Start with the social life see how it goes. I had a sister who was a wild card her problem was boys but same thing. You want your daughter to not close you out. So I'm not a parent but I heard the side of the kids stories
Still not quite sure what level this is at but I'd still suggest a lawyer.
The flip side is IF you come down too hard on her, it might make matters worse. been there, done that with our daughter. 2nd time her phone (no cell at the time) privileges were cut it was like a bolt of lightning hit her.
Jim is completely right here, you have to parent but you have to understand the consequences.
cmailliard
03-16-2013, 20:54
I am going agree with Bert on this - Deferred Sentence will most likely be the case. Keep her nose clean, classes, community service, and it will be expunged. Not a lawyer, just seen a handful of students with history that goes down like this.
I say fight it if possible, something small could screw her for the rest of her life.
Helping the .gov so your kids will learn a lesson went out the door a long time ago.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 21:02
FWIW: it's not the end of the world or hand wringing time trying to figure out "where we went wrong" "How did we ignore the signs" etc. It's life, What were you and your wife doing at her age?
Me, i racked up a few atty expenses. Last time i see him 40+ yrs later. He says, You know Before i was a congressman i use to be Jim's lawyer. [LOL]
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 21:03
I say fight it if possible, something small could screw her for the rest of her life.
Helping the .gov so your kids will learn a lesson went out the door a long time ago.
No use it as a lesson. If it appears to his daughter they are taking her side, she will never learn and "might" be the worse thing they could do.
theGinsue
03-16-2013, 21:04
It must be a day for shoplifting.
I was at the front door of Sportsmans Warehouse here in the Springs talking with member Scanker19 when we watched about a half dozen store workers grab a teenage girl and handcuff her. She tried to resist them but there was no escape for her. I heard her say a couple of times "i'll give you the stuff, just let me go." Probably not a good day for her.
GilpinGuy
03-16-2013, 21:11
Make sure the kid pays for the lawyer too. Work, chores, however it's appropriate. No free pass.
Good advice here, IMHO. It worked for me the first time I got busted doing something stupid when I was a kid. I was like "It costs HOW MUCH? HOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIT!"
EDIT: I feel the need to clarify here. I was partying in the woods with dozens of folks and we got raided by the cops. Apparently we were on private property, but high school kids had been partying there for years. I was one of the unforunate ones who actually had a car there. I wasn't drunk, but I got a "Trespassing" charge when I went to get my car. It was deferred after a year of good behavior since I was under 18.
I spent a ton of dough on the freaking lawyer though.
No use it as a lesson. If it appears to his daughter they are taking her side, she will never learn and "might" be the worse thing they could do.
I will never take the .gov side against my kids. Lots of people here, talk about how they will stand up against tyranny and fight till the end. The one and only thing I fight for is my family and that is till the bitter end. They’re the only reason I’m alive today.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 21:20
I will never take the .gov side against my kids. Lots of people talk here about how they will stand up against tyranny and fight till the end. The one and only thing I fight for is my family and that is till the bitter end. They’re the only reason I’m alive today.
Not the .gov side.
Supporting her while at the same time, understand her choice today can and will reflect on every thing she does down the road. I've been there, done that.
Now you get a speeding ticket and 15yrs down the road it cost you a security clearance.
Katastrophic
03-16-2013, 21:23
As a kid, my parents (divorced, but all the same) NEVER stood up for me. I was a good kid, thankfully. But I knew that if I got into deep shit NO ONE was there. I still have the same feelings about them. I've actually been considering an Official Rant due to recent events because I feel they are so ridiculous. To this very day I know my parents aren't there for me or my children. In the long run you need to be there. Discipline is far from punishment. Charge her for the lawyer. Make her do the yard work for a year. I don't know you but I feel that you need to do whatever YOU feel is necessary because if this is the first trouble you've had, you're doing pretty damn well as a parent.
Not the .gov side.
Supporting her while at the same time, understand her choice today can and will reflect on every thing she does down the road. I've been there, done that.
Now you get a speeding ticket and 15yrs down the road it cost you a security clearance.
On that point we can agree. Do what you need to do but you never throw your kids to the mercy of the courts. You fight them with everything you have. Even if you can't pay for a lawyer, you read some web pages and become a huge pain in the ass.
Bailey Guns
03-16-2013, 21:37
Helping the .gov so your kids will learn a lesson went out the door a long time ago.
Yeah. It's not like lack of accountability and not taking responsibility for actions has totally fucked up our society or anything. [/sarcasm]
You're not "helping" the government. The idea is to teach the kid a valuable life lesson.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 21:47
As a kid, my parents (divorced, but all the same) NEVER stood up for me. I was a good kid, thankfully. But I knew that if I got into deep shit NO ONE was there. I still have the same feelings about them. I've actually been considering an Official Rant due to recent events because I feel they are so ridiculous. To this very day I know my parents aren't there for me or my children. In the long run you need to be there. Discipline is far from punishment. Charge her for the lawyer. Make her do the yard work for a year. I don't know you but I feel that you need to do whatever YOU feel is necessary because if this is the first trouble you've had, you're doing pretty damn well as a parent.
FWIW: My old man was / is a 4th gen NYPD detective. There was no slack, NONE. You fuked up you made it right. I paid more than my share during my "teen years" and then some.
Flash forward late 90's. having the "talk" with our daughter. It was then i realized, as i told her. You know it's not that we're hard asses raising you, just trying to make sure you're safe and know what's happening.
Explaining i thought my old man was a prick, However in reality he wasn't. he was just trying to raise, us the way he felt was best at the time.
Fast forward, 2005? She's in a fighter wing off in the Indian Ocean and we receive a card / letter from her. She writes to thank us, for raising her in a way that taught her respect & responsibility. Something a few in her command lacked. She said those lessons / discipline got here where she was and will always remember how we supported and tried to do right by her, no matter how hard it may have seemed to her at the time.
THAT LETTER made every tear, smile, let down, recognition, accomplishment, etc worth every penny of mutual respect we earned with each other.
As i said Support BUT, make sure she understands what she does today will effect EVERYTHING she does down the road.
It sucks being a parent, fortunately i was never that bad when i was a kid.[facepalm]
i miss the days when a store would just call parents over stuff like this
Yeah. It's not like lack of accountability and not taking responsibility for actions has totally fucked up our society or anything. [/sarcasm]
You're not "helping" the government. The idea is to teach the kid a valuable life lesson.
Sorry but I think you're wrong. A good life's lesson (lifetime criminal record) is not worth destroying the rest of their life.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 21:52
i miss the days when a store would just call parents over stuff like this
Not me i'd take my chance with the cops. More lenient than a 1.5" belt.
KestrelBike
03-16-2013, 21:57
Not me i'd take my chance with the cops. More lenient than a 1.5" belt.
I cherish everytime my parents laid a hand on me, because I deserved it and more, and by golly I learned lessons.
Fast forward, 2005? She's in a fighter wing off in the Indian Ocean and we receive a card / letter from her. She writes to thank us, for raising her in a way that taught her respect & responsibility. Something a few in her command lacked. She said those lessons / discipline got here where she was and will always remember how we supported and tried to do right by her, no matter how hard it may have seemed to her at the time.
THAT LETTER made every tear, smile, let down, recognition, accomplishment, etc worth every penny of mutual respect we earned with each other.
That is an awesome story!
Explaining i thought my old man was a prick, However in reality he wasn't. he was just trying to raise, us the way he felt was best at the time.
That reminds me of my dad. One of my earliest memories was when I was about 5 and my dad told me “life is a motherfucker”. Completely true story and one I think about at least once a week. He proved over and over again that he was right.
It sucks being a parent, fortunately i was never that bad when i was a kid.
I’ve got to disagree with you here but I don’t think you were being serious. :)
Katastrophic
03-16-2013, 21:58
THAT LETTER made every tear, smile, let down, recognition, accomplishment, etc worth every penny of mutual respect we earned with each other.
As i said Support BUT, make sure she understands what she does today will effect EVERYTHING she does down the road.
It sucks being a parent, fortunately i was never that bad when i was a kid.[facepalm]
You're a lucky man to have someone there for you, even if it was hard sometimes. Like I said in my OP, punishment is different from discipline. I hope someday to be able to tell others with pride how much my children appreciate the discipline that I taught them.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 22:17
Sorry but I think you're wrong. A good life's lesson (lifetime criminal record) is not worth destroying the rest of their life.
I will disagree. Cutting your kid slack because you have an issue with the .gov, sends them the wrong message.. No matter how bad they mess up, as long as it's against the .gov DAD / Mom will always have their back. They can do no wrong. UNLESS they know there are repercussions, it will never "teach them anything"
Screw then my day says the .gov sucks and he'll take my side, always. Not going to happen.
My old man went ballistic when i got locked up. More so at the local LE's than me. Until i was arraigned and released on bond. Then his issues with the local yokels paled in comparison to the shit storm i faced.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Learn it now, while the lessons are cheap.
I will disagree. Cutting your kid slack because you have an issue with the .gov, sends them the wrong message.. No matter how bad they mess up, as long as it's against the .gov DAD / Mom will always have their back. They can do no wrong. UNLESS they know there are repercussions, it will never "teach them anything"
Screw then my day says the .gov sucks and he'll take my side, always. Not going to happen.
My old man went ballistic when i got locked up. More so at the local LE's than me. Until i was arraigned and released on bond. Then his issues with the local yokels paled in comparison to the shit storm i faced.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Learn it now, while the lessons are cheap.
Ok then, hypothetical situation.
Your 19 year old daughter gets home and you realize she's probably had a couple of beers. Well that's illegal and worse than that you think she might actually be intoxicated.
From your response I would guess you would call the police so they could administer a breathalyzer and deal with it appropriately rather than dealing with it yourself.
Sure she’ll lose her license and her job and probably won’t be able to continue with school. She’ll have $1000’s in debt for fines and defending herself. But at least she knows where you stand.
Katastrophic
03-16-2013, 22:30
It's not the "Daddy will come to my rescue" bit that you're claiming it is . Parents need to deal with this at home so the kid gets it before they go out into the real world. Permanent records can ruin future job opportunities these days.
You see, I’ve come to realize that I’m not going to accomplish anything meaningful in this life beyond my kids. My only legacy to the future is my family and I will do anything to protect them.
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 22:47
Sorry but I think you're wrong. A good life's lesson (lifetime criminal record) is not worth destroying the rest of their life.
Ok then, hypothetical situation.
Your 19 year old daughter gets home and you realize she's probably had a couple of beers. Well that's illegal and worse than that you think she might actually be intoxicated.
From your response I would guess you would call the police so they could administer a breathalyzer and deal with it appropriately rather than dealing with it yourself.
Sure she’ll lose her license and her job and probably won’t be able to continue with school. She’ll have $1000’s in debt for fines and defending herself. But at least she knows where you stand.
A couple of beers, 19? she was drinking @16. She comes home after X curfew time and shit hit the fan, she doesn't know it yet. You're confusing something she got caught doing by security / an LE vs, something she thinks she got away with.
We come from a different way of life than most if not all here. Drinking? a non issue in this household.
I will never throw our kid under the bus. However she also knew there were ramifications for her actions.
There are worse things in life as a parent you deal with/ worry about, then shop liftin, to some.. Are they doing drugs, stealing from you and their friends parent.
The OP had his first brush with the reality of being a parent in a not so perfect world. He, while understandably concerned, should be thankful it was only shop lifting, and not a body count.
This is his thread, we can digress some other time, other thread.
It is important for both parents to show up in court with the daughter and for the daughter to express remorse for her actions to the judge. She did something that is inexcusable and needs to be punished for that. Tell the judge that you, as parents, will be very strict with her from now on and he'll probably be lenient. Maybe, as a minor, she can even avoid probation.
I don't know about taking away her phone and internet, but I'd support making her pay off the legal fees and fines out of her own pocket.
A couple of beers, 19? she was drinking @16. She comes home after X curfew time and shit hit the fan, she doesn't know it yet. You're confusing something she got caught doing by security / an LE vs, something she thinks she got away with.
Her drinking is not something we ever worried about, outside of driving. We never had an issue with her drinking even when not of age. Hell we drank together, She was our DD.
I will never throw our kid under the bus. However she also knew there were ramifications for her actions.
There are worse things in life as a parent you deal with/ worry about, then shop lifting. Are they doing drugs, stealing from you and their friends parents.
Again it sounds like we're on the same page but I'm guessing we aren't.
I will defend our children until there is nothing left worth defending and I will not stand against them. You can take that to be as extreme as you want to but you're probably no were near close.
Sometimes you have to protect them from their own worst natures. it's better to let them burn their fingers a bit than let them grow up thinking they're fire proof...My parents left me fall on my ass and face the consequences on a number of occasions and it made me a better person. I'd hate to see where I ended up had they not let me learn such lessons..
Great-Kazoo
03-16-2013, 22:58
It is important for both parents to show up in court with the daughter and for the daughter to express remorse for her actions to the judge. She did something that is inexcusable and needs to be punished for that. Tell the judge that you, as parents, will be very strict with her from now on and he'll probably be lenient. Maybe, as a minor, she can even avoid probation.
I don't know about taking away her phone and internet, but I'd support making her pay off the legal fees and fines out of her own pocket.
The phone and internet are today's kids lifestyle. It's better than grounding them. No social contact outside of school, they're lost. Every kid i see it twittering away, Loose that privilege the whole interaction gig is gone. Kids don't know how to function w/out it.
The phone and internet are today's kids lifestyle. It's better than grounding them. No social contact outside of school, they're lost. Every kid i see it twittering away, Loose that privilege the whole interaction gig is gone. Kids don't know how to function w/out it.
Ding Ding Ding we have a winner
Byte Stryke
03-17-2013, 10:09
Sometimes you have to protect them from their own worst natures. it's better to let them burn their fingers a bit than let them grow up thinking they're fire proof...My parents left me fall on my ass and face the consequences on a number of occasions and it made me a better person. I'd hate to see where I ended up had they not let me learn such lessons..
Let it hit her square and solid, when she is on her "keester" Explain to her:
1.How she got there
2.Her current options
3.how to make the correct decision
I'm not talking about throwing someone to the wolves kinda thing, but more of a "negative actions have negative consequences" kinda thing. Make her accept responsibility for her actions.
I would even go as far as to make her do "extra" volunteering to recoup Mom and Dad. Animal shelters, Habitat for humanity, something of that nature to fill, what is obviuosly, extra time.
just my 2 centavos
I feel a little better after a nights sleep. She has some friends that I've never got a good vibe from, some questionable and some great. Looking back I should have gone with my gut more on who she hung out with. Not that it's anyone's fault but my daughters, she made her own decisions. We ended up making some adjustments here at home: more boundries, more limitations, more chores, made it clear she's picking up the entire financial tab for this and she won't have freedom of 'hanging out' at the mall or anywhere else unsupervised for quite awhile. Hopefully it's a life changer for her. We'll all be there at the court hearing, should be a great civics lesson for her. Thanks for the heads -up on what to expect.
jscwerve
03-17-2013, 12:59
I got busted for shoplifting when I was I think 13 or 14. It was at an AAFES (I grew up on Malmstrom AFB). It was not the first time I had shoplifted. I didn't even need to lift the stuff, I had 2 large paper routes by that time and had more money than most kids my age. I have no idea why I was doing it. I didn't hang out with a "bad crowd" or kids that were a bad influence. If anything, I was probably the bad influence, but from what I can remember, it was usually a group effort to cause trouble.
We were taken by the MPs th the station on base and of course they called my parents (dad specifically of course). For a bit of background, my dad was one of the strictest parents I have ever heard of. I hadn't actually gotten my ass beat for a couple of years, but I was expecting one this time. Dad came and picked my up, and it didn't seem that he was very upset while in the station. The second we were driving away the firestorm started. I had NEVER seen my dad that angry, I was scared of the beating about to be inflicted on me, when normally I wouldn't be (I used to laugh at my mom when she was trying to spank me with kitchen utensils and so she would hit me harder until her wooden spoons broke).
Don't get me wrong, I was not abused, and I deserved every single ass whooping I ever received, consequences of being a little shit I guess. I was never spanked/smacked without a very good reason (you know, like getting in a fight in school, general asshattery).
Anyways, once we got home, he didn't even lay a finger on me. Screamed and yelled at me for a while and then was sent to my room. I was grounded to my room for a month. Didn't seem bad at first, and I thought my folks would let up. They didn't. I had to stay in my room for the entire month, only being able to leave to eat meals, deliver my papers, and collect for my paper route. Going to the store or anywhere with my folks was out of the question as well. It sucked. This of course was long before cell phones computers, game systems. Hell, we only had one TV, the big 19" in the living room. This punishment was horrible. I could see/hear my friends hanging out outside daily. I didn't have too many things to keep me occupied either.
When I could finally leave my room, I was grounded to the house/yard for another month. This wasn't quite as bad, but it still sucked not being able to go anywhere at all. When I started to be able to go to the store with my folks again, I could only go into the store if I kept my hands in my pockets the entire time.
I think my total slew of restrictions and punishments lasted about 6 months. I know at the time I wished my old man had just beaten the shit out of me and got it over with.
The result: I haven't in my life one single time since then ever thought about stealing ANYTHING. I think that 6 months of what I thought was hell really got my head straight and to this day I am thankful that I had the strict parenting that I did have. If not I probably would have ended up in actual jail instead of the military. I know for a fact that I would not be where I am today and be as diciplined as I am without the loving punishments that my folks dealt out when I deserved it.
Things like this have lasting impressions and life implications. Good luck with your daughter and hope everything turns out for the best. I know from a personal standpoint that getting busted may have been one of the best things that could have happened to me (of course it seemed life wrecking at the time).
Update:
Went to court today. the judge was way too damn nice, no intimidation, no fear of God, no fire & brimstone. It was a good civics lesson for the daughter though.
She has 19 hours of community service to complete at a non-profit, a class to attend, and a 3 page report on the class due in about 6 weeks.
The shoplifting charge remains on her record. After she turns 18 we can go to court to have the record sealed or expunged where it is hidden from prospective employers, etc.
Just wanted to post in case anyone wanted to know how the system worked.
Great-Kazoo
04-24-2013, 11:18
Update:
Went to court today. the judge was way too damn nice, no intimidation, no fear of God, no fire & brimstone. It was a good civics lesson for the daughter though.
She has 19 hours of community service to complete at a non-profit, a class to attend, and a 3 page report on the class due in about 6 weeks.
The shoplifting charge remains on her record. After she turns 18 we can go to court to have the record sealed or expunged where it is hidden from prospective employers, etc.
Just wanted to post in case anyone wanted to know how the system worked.
The first encounter with the law usually ends thsi way. her second one IF it happens and IF it occurs before this shit is over and she could be looking at more serious charges. Especially as a repeat offender. If they don't have the sense enough to quit while they're ahead some local gray bar hotel time , hopefully will cure it.
KestrelBike
04-24-2013, 13:11
Update:
Went to court today. the judge was way too damn nice, no intimidation, no fear of God, no fire & brimstone. It was a good civics lesson for the daughter though.
She has 19 hours of community service to complete at a non-profit, a class to attend, and a 3 page report on the class due in about 6 weeks.
The shoplifting charge remains on her record. After she turns 18 we can go to court to have the record sealed or expunged where it is hidden from prospective employers, etc.
Just wanted to post in case anyone wanted to know how the system worked.
Interesting, thanks for the update! The judge is probably over it and doesn't think the fire/brimstone is worth his effort anymore.
I shoplifted a ton of GI Joes when I was 12ish. Did it mainly because we were poor, but also because it was an intense rush. Even at that age, the adrenaline was addictive.
Yes, I was the mother of all badasses. lol.
I am well versed in this subject....Aside from any criminal charges, many retailers also envoke the "Civil Demand" law thats on
the books on CO. They send your daughters info to a law firm, and they can demand up to $250!! Idea is to 'offset' the cost to
have a security (Loss Prevention) department. Send me an IM if I can give you anymore advise....
3 pages? Does not sound that challenging
bowhunter
04-28-2013, 11:16
I am surprised, I thought the judge would just give her an application for the Colorado legislature?
What I'm wondering is, WHY did she shoplift. Apparently she has the cash, so what motivated her. Maybe some counseling to get at the issues before she does this again. Something's going on, Dad.
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