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Jesus maybe able to walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land.
There is No theory of evolution.
Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live
Chuck Norris takes care of the homeless, he gives them roundhouses.
Chuck Norris doesn't age, he levels up.
All the spells that Harry Potter does is just television-friendly versions of things Chuck Norris can do with is dick.
Chuck Norris gets road head when the girl is driving.
I have a picture of Chuck Norris as my phone wallpaper and when I drop it the floor breaks.
If you watch the 2 girls one cup video really loud you can hear Chuck Norris in the background say "Now eat it."
Chuck Norris can fold water.