RANT!! Aren't weekends for relaxing? WTF#$^@%&#*^&^@#%^

[gnihcraes]

Got up early for a quick trip to the Emissions Testing station in Golden. Arrived at about 8:30am, pretty busy already, it is the last weekend of april, so I go ahead and wait in lane 2.

I'm a tailpipe test only, no Dyno.

Wait
Lane 3 and four get their turn.
Wait
Lane 3 and four get their turn.
Wait, damn.
Lane 3 and four get their turn.
Wait WTF
Lane 2, finally we move a couple through.
Wait
Ok, about 10 cars have gone through on lanes 3 and 4 while we still sit.
This can't be good, 18 year old coming and talking to all cars in LANE2!!!$!@#!$#!$~%
Dyno broke, they will be switching us to other lanes.
Ok, I try to be a reasonable person, shit happens.
Wait more.
Couple cars from lanes 3 and 4 each get their turns.
HELLO! we're still waiting on 2 you turds.
SO MUCH FOR MAKING SURE MY VEHICLE IS AT OPERATING TEMPERATURE BEFORE TESTING. BITCH HAS COOLED OFF NOW, HOPE IT PASSES, BUT THEY WON'T CARE IF IT DOESN'T!
Wait more.
Finally, car in front of me gets to go in Lane 3.
Manager comes out and waves for me to pull up to the stop sign to wait more. I refuse.
He comes to me and says I need you to move up.
Which lane am I going to? None at this time, I need you to move up.
Well if I get too close and you wave me on to Lane 1, 3 or 4, I won't be able to make the turn easily in the OLD CREW CAB TRUCK, BITCH! Not to mention it's like $5 in gas each time I start this beast. Fucker!
Finally get my turn, waved on to LANE 5, Outside of Building for RV's and such. I can actually make this maneuver in the rig.
Same young'n hooks me up to all the equipment and apologizes for the wait.
I'm not as mad as much about the dead equipment or the wait as I AM ABOUT THE FUCKING FIRST COME FIRST SERVE that isn't taking place. I've been here 1.5 hours in line and just now getting my turn.
Asks me to wait in the booth, and about told him to go fuck himself, but I didn't.
I see an older gent waiting over in the booth of LANE2, his ford ranger is stuck on the Dyno, rear wheels are locked by the alignment rollers, they can't get his truck off the dyno. Guess my situation might be worse. (I can actually help with this situation, I have a chain, and a truck)
I see my test guy wandering around like a lost puppy. Ut Oh.
Yep you guessed, the other E-Test station has gone down, he's afraid to tell me. Finally spits it out in front of all the other customers in the "BOOTH"
WELL WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT GETTING ME THROUGH A TEST HERE?
um um
I SUGGEST YOU HOLD UP ONE OF THE LINES RIGHT NOW AND I'LL GO NEXT.
um um
WAIT a bit longer while they all huddle and try to figure out what to do.
Feed me some bullshit that they have called the tech and he'll be here soon if I want to wait or I can go to another station, the closest one is probably down at 52nd and something in arvada, but nobody really seems to know "exactly where"? REALLY? YOU ALL WORK FOR THE SAME PLACE AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE THE NEXT NEAREST STATION IS AT?
I LOOK around, bet I can make all this shit work again, where's the breaker box? WHOOPS, POWER FAILURE. (i didn't, but probably would if I worked there) Don't know boss, guess the power went out. REBOOT!

I pack up and leave, head towards 52nd and Wadsworth, stop there and thankfully my smart phone does seem to know where the next station is.
I make it to that location, it's PACKED! They do have many more lanes, and all appear to be full staffed and running cars pretty quick.
GOOD THING I HAD TO TRAVEL TO HERE, MY VEHICLE IS WARM AGAIN.
MUST CONTINUE, I'VE GOT A CHECK ALREADY WASTED WITH THEIR NAME AND THE DATE ON IT.
Get my turn in a pretty reasonable amount of wait time. (excluding the previous location loss of time)

(CLOCK SAYS 10:30, crap, I started this project at 8ish this morning) HOLLY #^%(#^.

Nice fellows working there, get things hooked up and ready.
Tech is looking and looking, inspecting everything, over and over, ut oh.
(Yes it's older guys, it's a 1 ton, it doesn't have Catalytic Convertors, two air pumps blah blah) They get out a big 3 inch binder. Put it back. Never looked at it.
Finally, they either give up or realize that yes, it's a legal vehicle and proceed with the testing.
PASSED! (always nervous, being 85 carb fed 1 ton)

(meanwhile I get home and take the kids on a Lightrail train ride which turned out to be a MESS!) (see other lightrail thread)

My wife called. She left the house early this morning too. She had a LEED test to take for work, has been studying for weeks, very nervous.
She drove to the tech center and checked in for the testing, metal detectors, wanding, can't take personal belongings into the testing area etc., cameras watching every move.
Needs Photo ID. No problem, drivers license.
"I can't accept this maam, it's expired." HOLY !@$^@$%@%&%$&# (she failed to renew recently after birthday.)
So she gathers up her stuff, heads home (across town) to pick up her Passport and head back down for testing.
She's already a basket case from studying and nervous to pass the test, I'm sure this didn't help. LOL.
She calls, and passed the test. 196 of 200 points allowed.
GREAT DEAR! COME PICK US UP AT JEFFCO, IT'S A TWO HOUR WAIT TO GET BACK ON THE TRAIN TO HOME!

Called it quits. Enough for the day.

[hurley842002]

Yeah that is way to long to even attempt to read, besides I had to work today, so zero sympathy.

[ChunkyMonkey]

7/10 not enough adult language, Hard to follow, Wife actually had a good day at the end.

At least you are way ahead of the curve when OBAMACARE kicks in for everyone!

[wctriumph]

That is a pretty accurate depiction of events the last time I had to do that. It's Bush's fault but you know that already.

[car-15]

about the only reason I like living in pueblo, no emissions testing its a good thing to because I hit a big pothole and both of my cats and my dpf all fell off.

[ben4372]

I give it an 8. It made my blood pressure go up. Envirotest sucks, as does the light rail.

[Ridge]

Did you at least get to see the movie cars?

[wyome]

what's a LEED test?

[Holger Danske]

8/10. Too long.

[ray1970]

I made it through some of the part about the emission test.

I blame you.

First, who actually goes to one of those places anyways? That's what roadside emissions is for.

http://aircarecolorado.com/rapidscreen/

Second, by procrastinating like everyone else and running down at the last minute and on a weekend.... Well, are you really surprised it was a fiasco?

Sorry, don't take me busting your balls personally. I'm five straight days into a work project in Beatrice, Nebraska and probably have four more days to go. Makes me a bit cranky.