Chuck Norris

[RYAN50BMG]

My favorite: When the boogyman goes to sleep, he checks the closet for Chuck Norris.

[PsychoI3oy]

Ordinary people have panic attacks. Chuck Norris has Jack Bauer attacks!

Jack Bauer named his cat 'Chuck Norris.' Why? Because he's a pussy.

The only reason you're conscious right now is because Jack Bauer doesn't want to carry you.

Superman has Jack Bauer pajamas.

If Jack Bauer and MacGyver were locked in a room, Jack Bauer would make a bomb out of MacGyver.

Chuck Norris's beard can deflect bullets... Jack Bauer only needs 5 o'clock shadow.

Jack Bauer does the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle on Saturdays. In pen.

[DOC]

I have never see Jack Bauer shoot all of his ammo off just so he can fight in slow motion. So I think that he is second to chuck. But its a close second. Jack Bauer wasn't created back when movies were meant to entertain and get people a way to unwind. He was created when it was Bush's fault and we need a pussy black president. Let Jack shoot an M-60 from the hip and hit a bullseye everytime and we will talk again about rankings.

[WillysWagon]

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked Jack Bauer once, hence the saying we now have, 'He's Jacked up'.

[Marlin]

Clint Eastwood scowled at Chuck Norris,, Chuck has been hiding behind Christie Brinkley ever since...

Yes, I went there..

[theGinsue]

Then there'e this:

[CareyH]

When Mr.T crosses his arms the US terror threat level is raised to GOLD.

[VA_GUNZ]

Chuck norrisgot pulled over for speeding last week. He let the cop off with a warning.

A guy once told chuck norris that a roundhouse kick isnt the best way to kick someone. Historians have documented this as the worst mistake that has ever been made my any person ever.

Chuck norris took my virginity. He will take your too. If you are thinking "Im not a virgin" You are dead wrong.

the chief export of chuck norris is PAIN.


I will have you know that jack bauer is a douche and chuck would roundhouse kick him him in the vagina.

[PsychoI3oy]

Chuck Norris told Jack Bauer that he only killed 15 people cause he ran out of bullets. Jack told him he only killed 93 people cause he ran out of people.

Chuck Norris and Jack Bauer once got into a fight, the event is commonly known as the Big Bang. Who won? Just ask yourself when was the last time you saw a new episode of Walker Texas Ranger?

[Roger]

Clint Eastwood scowled at Chuck Norris,, Chuck has been hiding behind Christie Brinkley ever since...

Yes, I went there..

Hmmm. Maybe ole Chuck is smarter then we think.