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  1. #1
    Machine Gunner Hound's Avatar
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    Default Gun Cruise... Who's else is coming?

    Got this from a friend today. Sounds like fun.

    THE ULTIMATE ADVENTURE CRUISE: To The Point is excited to offer the ultimate adventure cruise along the pirate-infested coast of Somalia !
    We board our luxury cruise ship in Djibouti on the Gulf of Aden near the entrance to the Red Sea, and disembark in Mombassa , Kenya seven adrenaline-charged days later.

    Starting at $5,200 per-person (double occupancy, inside room) and $6,900 (veranda complete with bench rest), you'll relax like never before.
    That's because you are welcome to bring your own arsenal with you. If you don't have your own weapons, you can rent them from our onboard Master Gunsmith. Enjoy reloading parties every afternoon with skeet and marksmanship competitions every night!
    But the best fun of all, of course, is Pirate Target Practice.
    For the object of the cruise is to sail up and down the Somali Coast waiting to get hijacked by pirates. The weapons rental costs are as follows.

    Rent a full auto M-16 for only $25/day with ammo attractively priced at $16 per 100 rounds of 5.56 armor-piercing:

    On a budget? Rent a full-auto scope-mounted AK-47 for only $9/day with 7.62 ball ammo at $12 per 100 rounds:

    Hello! Nothing gets a pirate's attention like a Barrett M-107 50-cal sniper rifle; only $59/day with 25 rounds of armor-piercing ammo affordably priced at only $29.95.

    Need a spotter? Our professional crew members can double as spotters for only $30/hour (spotting scope included, but gratuities are not.)

    Want to make a real impact? Rent an RPG for only $175/day with three fragmentation rounds included!

    Also included: Free complimentary night vision equipment - and throughout the night, coffee, pastries and snacks are always available on the main deck from 7pm until 6am.
    Our deluxe package comes complete with gourmet meals and all rooms offer a mini-bar.
    But that's not all! Twin mounted miniguns are available for rental at only $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire!

    We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or you'll receive an instant $1,000 refund upon arrival in Mombassa.
    How can we make that guarantee? We operate at 5 knots just beyond 12 nautical miles off the coast of Somalia, thus in international waters where pirates have no rights whatever. In fact, we make three passes through the area's most treacherous waters to ensure maximum visibility by Somali"mother ships".
    We repeat this for five days, making three complete passes past the entire Somali Coast. At night, the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot every five minutes with loud discomusic directionally beamed shore side to attract maximum attention.

    Testimonials from previous participants in the Somali Cruise:
    ********************
    "Six attacks in 4 days were more than I expected. I bagged three pirates, my wife nailed two, and my 12-year old son sank two boats with the mini-gun. This wonderful cruise was fun for the whole family" -- Fred D., Cincinnati , OH
    ********************
    "Pirates 0, Passengers 32! Well worth the trip! Can't recommend it highly enough!" -- Ben L., Bethesda , MD
    ********************
    "I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in 'Nam. Don't worry about getting shot by pirates... they never even got close to the ship with the crap they shoot and their lousy aim... reminds me of a drunken juicer door-gunner we picked up from the motor pool in Phu Bai!" -- Dan J. - Denver , CO
    ***************************

    Come on board and bag your own clutch of genuine Somali pirates! But cabin space is limited so you need to respond quickly. Reserve your package before 31 July 2014 and get a great bonus - 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice. So sign up for the Ultimate Somali Coast Adventure Cruise now!
    My life working is only preparation for my life as a hermit.

    Feedback https://www.ar-15.co/threads/99005-Hound

  2. #2
    Paper Hunter
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    Hell yes sign me up. Reasonable prices sure.
    Last edited by 2XS; 07-27-2014 at 16:23.

  3. #3
    The "Godfather" of COAR Great-Kazoo's Avatar
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    Washboard Alley, AZ.
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    SEVEN ADRENALIN CHARGED DAYS LATER.

    The wife had more fun than i did, but she likes head shots. Guess with the mini, it's a No Brainer Bitter clinger and family, EVERYTOWN USA
    The Great Kazoo's Feedback

    "when you're happy you enjoy the melody but, when you're broken you understand the lyrics".

  4. #4
    Iceman sniper7's Avatar
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    Hmmmm, wait for it.....
    All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don't break em for no one.

    My Feedback

  5. #5
    Gives a sh!t; pretends he doesn't HoneyBadger's Avatar
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    C-Springs again! :)
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    hahahahahaha that's spectacular!
    My Feedback

    "When law and morality contradict each other, the citizen has the cruel alternative of either losing his moral sense or losing his respect for the law." -Frederic Bastiat

    "I am a conservative. Quite possibly I am on the losing side; often I think so. Yet, out of a curious perversity I had rather lose with Socrates, let us say, than win with Lenin."
    ― Russell Kirk, Author of The Conservative Mind

  6. #6
    Zombie Slayer wctriumph's Avatar
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    I'll wait until they add in the attack helicopter with mini-guns option package.

    "If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking."
    George S. Patton

    "A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both."
    Dwight D. Eisenhower

    "Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth."
    John F. Kennedy

    ?A motorcycle is a bicycle with a pandemonium attachment, and is designed for the special use of mechanical geniuses, daredevils and lunatics.?
    George Fitch. c 1916.

  7. #7
    Guest
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    Damn, I've been vacationing all wrong.

  8. #8
    Paper Hunter JerryG's Avatar
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    Jul 2011
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    http://www.somalicruises.com/
    Here is the link. This would be one kick ass vacation.

  9. #9
    Guest
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    This has to be a joke. Nobody has .223 at sixteen cents a round.

  10. #10
    Zombie Slayer Aloha_Shooter's Avatar
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    Colorado Springs, CO
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    The original post in To The Point was dated May 2009 (I was expecting April 1 ...). Cute story and website but just looks like a good joke.

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