I've thought long and hard about this, and written several replies- only to erase them and start again.

The term 'feminine' means "to have qualities associated with women." There are two parts to this: the physical aspect, and the social construct. Physical differences between men and women are usually fairly obvious, and there's no denying that most men are stronger and bigger than women. To deny physical characteristics would be silly.

But the social construct of the idea of 'feminine' is fluid, and oftentimes impractical. The social definition is slippery, and depends upon class, culture, time period, trends and so on. Is it a demonstration of femininity to fire a .357 at a firing range? Would it help if the gun were pink?
In considering the loss of femininity...who does that benefit? Would it benefit the woman maintenance worker to not be able to carry a 40 pound toolbox up a staircase when men are watching, to maintain the illusion of her femininity? What about the girl that doesn't want to wreck her pretty pink manicure, so instead waits for someone to come along the road to help her change her tire?

I believe what I'm trying to say is that femininity is often an illusion or a tool that can be used for or against women. I can't tell you the number of ties when people would say, "You can't do that, because you're a girl," or "You're supposed to like pink guns. You're a girl." So I just smile and do what I want. If people think less of me because they think I am not feminine enough...who is that hurting?