Tales from Tanner

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Last time I went I saw a couple guys in their early twenties walking around, sporting their best goatees they could muster, not looking or buying anything, basically doing mall laps, with tactical vests on complete with knife strapped in and laced real tight, OD ripstop pants tucked into their swat boots and fingerless gloves on. At that point I knew I wasn't cool enough to keep going.

I did buy a Taser that day to taze a buddy that lost a bet to me.

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I did buy a Taser that day to taze a buddy that lost a bet to me.

Remind me never to make a bet with you!

Story?

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Remind me never to make a bet with you!

Story?

I think I'm like 4 for 5000 lifetime, betting me is usually a pretty good idea.

I have a friend from Boston that bartends in Ft. Collins. I used to be quite the regular there and he and I would arm wrestle, have slap contests, and made several bets, pretty much all of which I lost. He always had a way of getting me to go again...

Well anyway during an evening of time traveling at the bar he and I were cussing and discussing about his beloved Patriots. I grew up in Oklahoma so I was always a Cowboys fan, and low and behold they were playing in two days. I think the Pats were undefeated at that point(maybe 5-6 years ago?) and in a moment of what can only be called as whiskey fueled intuition I had run the numbers in my head and I bet him that the 'boys were gonna put the hurt on Brady and crew. He said he didn't want to bet money because it was boring and he wanted to make in "interesting". He was probably pretty confident the win was in the bag. I'd stumbled across a couple videos around the YouTube of cops tazing each other for "training purposes" earlier that day, and since I felt 10ft tall and bulletproof I figured loser gets tased. Brilliant!

When I woke up and realized what I had done I knew I was screwed.. The good Lord must've taken pity on me, cause the Cowboys won. I still can't believe it to this day. And I haven't collected on my bet yet either. But when I do, I'm gonna video tape it and I'll post it here. He's a class act though he really wants me to do it. Good times up in FoCo at that place.

ETA: Correction, he gave me a 5pt spread and they lost by 4.

[Skip]

I think I'm like 4 for 5000 lifetime, betting me is usually a pretty good idea.

I have a friend from Boston that bartends in Ft. Collins. I used to be quite the regular there and he and I would arm wrestle, have slap contests, and made several bets, pretty much all of which I lost. He always had a way of getting me to go again...

Well anyway during an evening of time traveling at the bar he and I were cussing and discussing about his beloved Patriots. I grew up in Oklahoma so I was always a Cowboys fan, and low and behold they were playing in two days. I think the Pats were undefeated at that point(maybe 5-6 years ago?) and in a moment of what can only be called as whiskey fueled intuition I had run the numbers in my head and I bet him that the 'boys were gonna put the hurt on Brady and crew. He said he didn't want to bet money because it was boring and he wanted to make in "interesting". He was probably pretty confident the win was in the bag. I'd stumbled across a couple videos around the YouTube of cops tazing each other for "training purposes" earlier that day, and since I felt 10ft tall and bulletproof I figured loser gets tased. Brilliant!

When I woke up and realized what I had done I knew I was screwed.. The good Lord must've taken pity on me, cause the Cowboys won. I still can't believe it to this day. And I haven't collected on my bet yet either. But when I do, I'm gonna video tape it and I'll post it here. He's a class act though he really wants me to do it. Good times up in FoCo at that place.

ETA: Correction, he gave me a 5pt spread and they lost by 4.

That is awesome! Please do post it, that would be good fun. Find some crash mats too.