Flip side of marriage?

[Irving]

Sounds a lot like a lady boss I once worked for. Mine got smarter because after the insubordination thing didn't work, she said I brought a gun to work and threatened to blow up the building. Even though she had a reputation for being crazy and manipulative, the company couldn't let something like that go unanswered. They laid her off not too long after they forced me out.

[GilpinGuy]

Win!

[KevDen2005]

Just a thought. Have your friend get the girlfriend to sign a lease or rental agreement. That'll go well.

It would be a good early test. It's more like the scientific method. You already have a prediction on how will end, but the test will help solidify that.

[Gman]

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned"

[BushMasterBoy]

I have heard of marriage referred to as "legalized prostitution". I never married. No woman is that crazy.

[TheGrey]

Not all marriages are like that, BushMasterBoy. If they have a solid foundation in friendship, respect, and open communication, it can be a wonderful thing.

[spqrzilla]

As mentioned above, common law marriage in Colorado does not work as most assume. There is no time period. Holding yourself out as married is what makes you actually "married". And exactly how a court might interpret various things like, e.g., telling your employer you are married for health insurance, is done on a case by case basis. Meaning there are no bright lines. I won't say that a joint checking account by itself will make you married, but it might be a part of the evidence introduced if the question is litigated.

This is not a good thing in general. I won't go into the historical reason for this very old Colorado court decision but the problem is that its not predictable. Often people who ask me for advice on the topic of "breaking up" with someone with whom they never formally married get the advice to get a real divorce because of the vagueness of the common law marriage in Colorado.

Amusingly, when I first moved to Colorado, across the street was a couple. The man introduced himself to me, and his girlfriend, saying in literally his second sentence: "We are not married". Obviously, someone had explained to him common law marriage in Colorado

[CS1983]

I have heard of marriage referred to as "legalized prostitution". I never married. No woman is that crazy.

When's the last time you took off work early to go take your hooker's kid (and yours) to the doctor in Denver, and then went back to work until close (6 hours after you generally get off work) while sick too? When did you last spend your entire Saturday, while sick as well, taking them to various places which will see a pregnant woman for a common cold: only to end up in Labor and Delivery at the hospital because she is over 20 weeks pregnant and they have to monitor the baby to end up giving her a z-pack for a common cold (which is made worse by the lowered immunity due to pregnancy)?

When's the last time your hooker cooked dinner she couldn't eat due to morning sickness, so you have dinner and left-overs for lunch?

Marriage, true marriage (not the appearance of marriage), is by no means legalized prostitution. Where marriages fail is when selfishness takes root over selflessness. Marriage is a partnership.

If we think of marriage in a military context, it's both parties striving to be the one up first, down last, eating last so that juniors can eat first, leading from the front and carrying the heaviest load while setting the pace. It's ID'ing the machine gun nest and charging forward. It's jumping on the suicide bomber. It's a call and a duty, not a physical Call of Duty. There are no accolades and there are no medals. There's simply getting to the ETS point of one's life and knowing you did your best. There's simply showing your wife what to look for in a replacement team leader if, God forbid, you die in the process.

It's no wonder the divorce rate is so high and false marriages fail (or even true marriages which become broken due to selfishness): Everyone wants to HALO and be Billy Badass in the sack, but not many want to carry the ruck when it's mile 9 of only God knows how many on another sandy trail that may or may not have a live fire range at the end, and it's supposed to be your day off. Sometimes it just sucks. But it's the suffering which binds a unit, not the frat-like parties in town.

[BushMasterBoy]

OP my advice to your friend is hire a "professional".

[TheGrey]

Beautifully said, CavSct1983!