Thanks for the suggestion but, based on what I say with the current posted opportunities, it appears as though college education is a requirement. This is a common non-starter for me so I'm kind of used to it at this point in my life though. The companies where I know someone who's able to help get my foot in the door have been happy they looked outside of their general hiring box/requirements. In a situation like your company where I don't know anyone my resume likely won't even get viewed by a human being w/o the proper credentials the software looks for as specified by the person in charge of hiring.
Only if there's a master's program. (I assume that's the joke you were going for)