To date, or not to date? A red flag question

[Zundfolge]

Well..... asking this bunch for dating and relationship advice is like asking a Salmon how to ride a bicycle.....

Glib cynicism is fun and all, but the truth is the majority of the folk that post here are likely happily married family men. Apparently most of us here were capable of finding suitable mates somehow so we may not be the worst group to ask.

[MrAK]

I have no idea about what you are asking, since red flag laws are new, and yet you are asking for other people's experience (only?!)

Suffice it to say that I think Red Flag Laws are bad for dating.

-John

My OP:
Well, the title could be taken a few different ways, but getting back in to the dating scene has me wondering about the impact of red flag laws and the people we date. There?s been a few relationships I would have ended much sooner or simply not started had they been initiated after the advent of red flag laws.
I?m looking for a show of hands as to wether a red flag law would have prevented anyone here from being in a relationship with a crazier than average partner, or any great stories that might be related.


I?ve struggled with grammar and syntax my entire life, though I thought I was clear in asking about how a red flag law might have impacted a relationship with an off balance or crazy person in the past, had the red flag nonsense already been enacted.

[Irving]

Honestly I don't know why you're so worried about red flag laws. I know at least one person in my personal life that had bogus DV chargers and can no longer have guns. That's been a threat for a long time, and has a WAY lower threshold than red flag laws with exactly the same outcome. Three only time you should be worried about laws when dating is if you're doing illegal things.

In the nicest, most polite way possible, it sounds like you're just nervous to get back into the game and are stalling by asking here. Get out there and mingle and you can chat with us later.

[iego]

It's pretty clear that red flag laws should scare anyone that dates anyone. Or anyone that interacts with anyone.

An individual other than yourself, can indict you, and say you are "dangerous" and the state will take over and "interact with you" on your date.

-John

[MrAK]

Getting back out there is what I’m doing already. I believe this question came up while reflecting on past relationships and the progression of what I’m looking for in someone I date. I don’t personally believe in the “if you’ve done nothing wrong then you have nothing to fear” concept, especially when it comes to dating women lol

[Irving]

I know, I was just giving you a crappy analogy.

[FoxtArt]

Idk. I never actually dated someone that I would've been afraid of in that fashion. Now, it would've been a concern when I helped some people (outside of dating), but I still would've done the right thing anyway. Then again, I detected and bailed reeeal early on the crazy ones. But Ive helped a lot of people that got sucked in deep, and it's a shitshow. I've seen several fake TROs etc... The belief that keep your nose clean and you have nothing to worry about is incorrect. More correctly, be someone who other people are afraid to piss off (and I don't mean from a violence aspect) and you never have to worry.

ETA: example. A 9.5 on the HCM that I found on a blind date that cast bullets for work. In her 20s. Could strip a 1911. (I thought I got lucky at the time!) Wanted to join the coast guard and have someone waiting at home.

Nope.

Later heard she got kicked out of the coast guard.

Yup.

[JohnnyEgo]

I like to pick 'em bat-shit crazy from the start, so at least I know what I am getting into.
Strategy hasn't failed me yet!

[BREATHER]

My major in college was Forensic Psychology and it was when I was in my 40's. Had I studied that earlier in life, I would not have even considered dating 3/4 of the bitches I did date

[Great-Kazoo]

On a serious note I'd say the hell with the Red Flag concerns and be more worried about the #METOO ones.

If you're casually dating why bring up guns in the 1st 1 or 3 dates? I'd be more worried about a date that goes on to an intimate encounter or two. Then the person in question freaks over something. OR one of her friends puts a bug in their ear, next thing you know you're being charged with a sexual assault.

Not possible? In todays sensitive feels age what began as a great sexual partner turns in to a nightmare, for some. Not everyone, just something i'd be more worried about.

I'd also suggest any text, emails etc you swap are saved. Hell i had even given thought (if the marriage didn't work) to actually record any dates i were on. Just in Case.






With that said like Johnnyego. I'm a guy who loved dating the disaster, crazy, women. Oh to revisit some of my younger years.