Sorry, hard to calm down when I get to deal with idiots all day. No, not on this site. I'm talking about work. I work in a mapping/blueprinting division of the utilities department... here's a conversation that took place less than an hour ago:

Me: Hello Sir, what can I do for you today.
Them: I need a map.
Me: (Well duh) Well, you came to the right place. What sort of map and what of?
Them: I need an ariel of such and such intersection.
Me: An ariel? Ok, do you need a topographic, contour, or actual satellite pciture?
Them: Uhh... anyway you can just send up a plane to take the picture? I think a satellite would be too far away.
Me:... (Really? Dude....) Yes sir, we can get as close as you need. As a matter of fact, I can read the date off a dime in your palm from 200 miles out.
Them: ... I don't know, that might a little too close.
Me: ... (wow)... Ok Sir, let me pull some images up and we can go from there. What TYPE of map do you need?
Them: A ariel, one from the sky.
Me: Yes Sir, I understand that but... what information do you need on the map, scape heights, road names, dirt composites, utility mains, etc?
Them: Umm... I don't know, let me call my boss. Can I use your phone?
Me: ... (I see the cell in your coveralls chest pocket friend...) Yes Sir.