It was also posted in a thread here recently. A member was having an issue with a neighbor's yard light.Originally Posted by Irving
Colorado AR-15 Shooters Club Discussion Forums
Welcome to the Colorado AR-15 Shooters Club Discussion Forums.
Welcome to the Colorado AR-15 Shooters Club Discussion Forums.
It was also posted in a thread here recently. A member was having an issue with a neighbor's yard light.
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Credit TFOGGER : Liberals only want things to be "fair and just" if it benefits them.
Credit Zundfolge: The left only supports two "rights"; Buggery and Infanticide.
Credit roberth: List of things Government does best; 1. Steal your money 2. Steal your time 3. Waste the money they stole from you. 4. Waste your time making you ask permission for things you have a natural right to own. "Anyone that thinks the communists won't turn off your power for being on COAR15 is a fucking moron."
A man was telling his buddy "You won't believe what happened last night.
My daughter walked into the living room and said, "Dad, cancel my allowance immediately, forget my college tuition loan, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out the window, take my TV and my laptop. Please take any of my jewelry to the Salvation Army or Cash Converters. Then, sell my car, take my front door key away from me and throw me out of the house. Then, disown me and never talk to me again. Don't forget to write me out of your will and leave my share to any charity you choose."
"Holy Smokes," replied the friend, "she actually said that?"
"Well, she didn't put it quite like that. She actually said, 'Dad, meet my new boyfriend-- Mohammed. We're going to work together on Hillary's election campaign!'"
Ginsue - Admin
Proud Infidel Since 1965
"You can't spell genius without Ginsue." -Ray1970, Apr 2020
Ginsue's Feedback
HA!
Wife’s Diary:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn’t flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn’t say much.
I asked him what was wrong; He said, ‘Nothing…’
I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn’t upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior. I don’t know why he didn’t say, ‘I love you, too.’
When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep; I cried. I don’t know what to do. I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
Husband’s Diary:
A five putt… who the f*&k five putts?
David - CS, CO feedback
It's a measure of the civility in this country that no ones seems to fear constantly pissing off the people who own lots of guns.
A teacher asks each of the kids in class what they need, as opposed to want.
Joey says "A computer."
The teacher replies, "That would be very useful."
Jimmy says "A new lawn mower" and gets a similar response.
Little Johnny pops up and says "At my house we don't need anything!"
The teacher asks him to think again carefully, as everybody needs something.
Little Johnny replies, "No I'm sure. When Obama was re-elected, I remember my dad saying, "Well, that's the last fucking thing we needed!”
"The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter." Sir Winston Churchill
“It is well for that citizenry of nation are not understand banking and money system, if they are, I believe there would be revolution before Tuesday morning.” Henry Ford
My feedback: http://www.ar-15.co/threads/33234-lt-MADDOG-gt
A 65-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk.
The Receptionist said, ‘Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?’
‘There’s something wrong with my penis’, he replied.
The receptionist became irritated and said, ‘You shouldn’t come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that. ‘
‘Why not, you asked me what was wrong and I told you,’ he said.
The Receptionist replied; ‘Now you’ve caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private.’
The man replied, ‘You shouldn’t ask people questions in a roomful of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone.’
The man walked out, waited several minutes, and then re-entered.
The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, ‘Yes??’
‘There’s something wrong with my ear,’ he stated.
The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. ‘And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?’
‘I can’t piss out of it,’ he replied.
A very cute Catholic nun was sitting on a train opposite a Muslim man wearing a turban, who was eating shrimp.
Every time he ate one, he definitely spat the tail in her direction,
requiring her to dodge or deflect it.
He finished the box of shrimp and threw it out the window. Seeing
this, she'd had enough of his rudeness, lack of manners, and his total disdain of women. She got up and pulled the train's Emergency Cord.
The Muslim looked at her and said, "You'll get fined $250 for doing
that, you stupid female, worthless Infidel, Catholic bitch."
She smiled and said to him, "When I cry rape and they smell your fingers, you'll get 10 years in prison, you towel-headed camel-fucker.
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's enjoying it, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them. Then he grabs some sliced limes and eats them. Then he jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, he somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey did?"
The guy says, "No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the guy. "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. Sorry. I'll pay for everything."
The man finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate and leaves.
Two weeks later, he's in the bar again, and his pet monkey is with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his ass, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.
"Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks.
"No, what?" replies the guy.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his ass, pulled it out, and ate it!" says the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the guy. "He still eats everything in sight but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures everything first."
"There is nothing in the world so permanent as a temporary emergency." - Robert A Heinlein The Moon is a Harsh Mistress
Feedback for TheGrey
A woman goes into the Bass Pro Shop to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter. A Bass Pro Shop associate is standing there wearing dark shades.
She says, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says, "Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything from the sound it makes."
She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.
He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-LB. test line. It's a good all around combination and it's on sale this week for only $20.00."
She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!"
As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor.
"Oh, that sounds like a Master Card," he says.
She bends down to pick it up and accidentally farts. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.
The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please."
The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me the rod and reel were on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?"
He replies, "Yes, Ma'am, the rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck Call is $11.00 and the Bear Repellent is $3.50."
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