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Thread: Joke of the Day

  1. #561
    SeƱor Bag o' Crap Scanker19's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bentsight View Post
    I like my women like my coffee too, tall, hot and in large cups.
    I also like my women like I like my coffee: ground up and in the freezer.
    Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
    Haw haw haw?..

  2. #562
    Ammocurious Rucker61's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by davsel View Post
    Dear Family and Friends!


    I am sorry that I have not been responsive lately to your emails. I have been somewhat under the weather since my doctors informed me that I have an acute case of Post Islamic Stress Trauma with Apologetic Whitehouse Fatigue (PIST-AWF).


    For those of you who do not know what that is, PIST-AWF is a newly defined disease that is found to be widespread and highly contagious.
    Symptoms include, but may not be limited to:
    Severe pain of the scalp from pulling your own hair while viewing the President pander to Muslim terrorists.
    Loose bowels from swallowing the fact we elected Obama twice.
    Extreme hunger due to vomiting from nightly seeing terrorists murdering innocent people.

    If you feel you have Post Islamic Stress Trauma with Apologetic Whitehouse Fatigue, please notify your local election board and place your name on the list for a cure.


    It is hoped that the cure will be available in November of 2016.
    Well?
    Te occidere possunt sed te edere non possunt nefas est

    Sane person with a better sight picture

  3. #563
    Mr Yamaha brutal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rucker61 View Post
    Well?
    Miracle cure!
    My Feedback
    Credit TFOGGER : Liberals only want things to be "fair and just" if it benefits them.
    Credit Zundfolge: The left only supports two "rights"; Buggery and Infanticide.
    Credit roberth: List of things Government does best; 1. Steal your money 2. Steal your time 3. Waste the money they stole from you. 4. Waste your time making you ask permission for things you have a natural right to own. "Anyone that thinks the communists won't turn off your power for being on COAR15 is a fucking moron."

  4. #564
    Grand Master Know It All BladesNBarrels's Avatar
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    Two atoms are sitting next to each other and one says, "I've lost an electron."

    The other asks, "Are you sure?"

    "Yeah," the first replies. "I'm positive."
    Buying Randall Made Knives and Randall 1911 Pistols

    BladesNBarrels Feedback

  5. #565
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  6. #566
    .
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    Devastated.
    A very sad day today.
    After seven years of training in the medical fields and hard work, a very good friend of mine was fired after one minor indiscretion. He slept with one of his clients and can now no longer work in the profession.
    What a waste of time, effort, training and money. A genuinely nice guy and an absolutely brilliant mortician.

  7. #567
    Splays for the Bidet CS1983's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dave View Post
    On the way to work this morning, some guys were walking on the side of the road, rucking. Reflective belts location? On their rucks, not visible to the oncoming traffic they were facing as they walked.
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    It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged. - The Cleveland Press, March 1, 1921, GK Chesterton

  8. #568
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    Quote Originally Posted by CavSct1983 View Post
    On the way to work this morning, some guys were walking on the side of the road, rucking. Reflective belts location? On their rucks, not visible to the oncoming traffic they were facing as they walked.
    All 3 bases I was stationed at required that on our road marches. Even in air assault school with a 20 mile march starting at 0400 we had to wrap it around our ruck. Though I guess if you wrap it around your waist the ruck covers the back part of it.

  9. #569
    Splays for the Bidet CS1983's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dave View Post
    All 3 bases I was stationed at required that on our road marches. Even in air assault school with a 20 mile march starting at 0400 we had to wrap it around our ruck. Though I guess if you wrap it around your waist the ruck covers the back part of it.
    Well aware of the soft-safety initiatives... they just make no sense when one is walking against traffic and the reflective portion is on the back.
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    It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged. - The Cleveland Press, March 1, 1921, GK Chesterton

  10. #570
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    Tell this joke to someone.
    Why did the chicken cross the road?
    I don't know, why?
    To get to the idiots house.

    Knock knock
    who's there
    the chicken

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