Too funny to keep to my self(NSFW)

[Scanker19]

Mods if this don't work here feel free to delete, but I have got to share this.

http://thesmokinggun.com/buster/west...-police-report

[ShooterChick]

i dont even know what to say to that.... that nasty..... i would have just told her to cut my throat gross gross gross..... when u cant get any i guess it comes down to deadly force

[Dusty Johnson]

Looking at that woman's picture and reading about the smell, I'd much rather let her kill me.

[Zundfolge]

...Mellinger arrested her for domestic assault and brandishing a deadly weapon.

I'm confused ... was the officer referring to the knife or ... uh ... the other thing?

[ShooterChick]

I'm confused ... was the officer referring to the knife or ... uh ... the other thing?

either way i dont want to see it

[jerrymrc]

I now have to stay up a little longer since I do NOT want this on my mind when I fall asleep.

[Irving]

Excellent! Reading awesome police reports was my favorite part of handling insurance claims.

[Hitman 6]

“Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.”

[68Charger]

wrong on sooo many levels, but some of the comments are priceless...

Best single quote, IMHO:
"I think her being naked from the waist down qualifies as brandishing a lethal weapon."

or points for imagination:
"The poor cop! He arrested her while when was naked from the waist down, with her slimy junk all hangin down like a couple of buttered tortillas.... Then he had to smell it all the way to the station.... Then he had to clean the goo off of the back seat of his cruiser... What a rotten day for him!"

Honest insight:
"She makes me appreciate the simple beauty of my right hand."

and there were a couple hilarious exchanges:
"I'm going to go take a shower and go to church. I will do my best to unremember everything I just read."
"Really? I was thinking I'd try ramming my head into a wall. They say that you don't remember the three hours proceeding any major head trauma. It seems worth it...."


Or this exchange:
Submitted by Chad Dole on Thu, 2010-11-04 21:00.
"As a gay male, I can tell you this article is absolutley terrifying. That terroristic face is going to be in many nighmares to come. Give me the Taliban anyday!"
"What? Were you presented with the two scenarios as a viable option? "Either eat this woman's pussy or suck all the dicks of the Taliban!""

[Scanker19]

her slimy junk all hangin down like a couple of buttered tortillas....

well you (and that guy) just ruined one of my favorite snacks....