Grammar Gurus: proof read this phrase.

[Lex_Luthor]

Here's my attempt:

The situation in Mesoamerica contrasts strongly: that area provided only two domesticable animals (the turkey and the dog), whose meat yield was far lower than that of cows, sheep, goats, and pigs - and corn, Mesoamerica’s staple grain, was, as I’ve already explained, difficult to domesticate and perhaps slow to develop.

[ghettodub]

The whole sentence bugs me, and is melting my brain...

It says a situation, but doesn't specify what situation; it should mention that it's related to food or crops, first and foremost. And really, what it's describing, doesn't contrast that much, as it's stating that both the meat and corn don't yield that much and aren't that easy to domesticate. A contrast would say something like "They have a lot of meat, but not a lot of corn, etc..." or something like that.

[SuperiorDG]

The situation in Mesoamerica contrasts strongly: that area provided only two domestic-able animals (the turkey and the dog), whose meat yield was far lower than that of cows, sheep, goats and pigs; and corn, Mesoamerica’s staple grain, was, as I’ve already explained, difficult to domesticate and perhaps slow to develop.

[SuperiorDG]

What do we get if we guess the book? G-G-S J Diamond

[Irving]

Looks like a few people just cheated for the answer.

Funkfool and SuperiorDG win. I haven't gotten the book back out to check, but I read the sentence so many times last night, I think they got it.

[Dr_Fwd]

Looks like a few people just cheated for the answer.

Funkfool and SuperiorDG win. I haven't gotten the book back out to check, but I read the sentence so many times last night, I think they got it.

Well, at least I was really close...

[theGinsue]

The situation in mesoamerica contrasts strongly that area provided only two domesticable animals the turkey and the dog whose meat yield was far lower than that of cows sheep goats and pigs and corn mesoamericas staple grain was as Ive already explained difficult to domesticate and perhaps slow to develop.

My attempt:
The situation in Mesoamerica contrasts strongly. That area provided only two domesticable animals (the turkey, and the dog - whose meat yield was far lower than that of cows, sheep, goats, and pigs) and corn (Mesoamericas staple grain. It was, as I've already explained, difficult to domesticate and perhaps slow to develop.).

I never should have used that semi-colon in the title.

Fixed. Changed to a full colon. (hehehe -full colon. That paints a pretty picture)

[Irving]

Now that we know the answer to how it was actually written in the book, personally I would have just made it more than one sentence.

[theGinsue]

I haven't read past your OP in this thread. I've been reviewing my version and am not satisfied with it (see many places where it needs to be changed), but I'll leave it stand.

[sniper7]

Either way, that is one of the poorest written sentences I have ever seen (the corrected one). If that crap can get published then I am going to write a book.