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  1. #1
    Sig Fantastic Ronin13's Avatar
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    Default State Cars- A funny read

    All this crabby, sad, negative talk lately (understandable), I got an email from a friend of mine who is an amateur comedy writer I'll share to lighten the mood a bit:


    State Cars
    We all are familiar with state birds, state flowers, and such... but I have compiled a list of state cars for some of the states I've either lived in or traveled to...
    Alaska- State Car: The Snowmobile. Yeah I know, technically it's not a car, but dammit it's about the only means of transportation throughout a lot of the year, especially in the villages.
    California- The Prius. You shouldn't be surprised by this, those tree hugging democrats out there love to be enviro-friendly... just like Al Gore!
    Utah- The Jeep Wrangler. I'm not sure if Mormons have a preferred car, but this, thanks to Moab, is pretty popular.
    Nevada- The Cadillac Convertible. Nothing says Nevada like a drop-top Caddy cruising down the Las Vegas strip at 3am!
    Colorado- Tie between Subaru Impreza Outback and Chevy Tahoe. Either or, it must have a ski rack.
    Texas- Lifted Chevy Pickup. Nuff said.
    Oklahoma- Old Chevy Pickup. If you've never been to OK, then you won't understand this.
    Montana- Lifted Dodge Pickup. Seriously, and it doesn't matter the year, or if it's regular or diesel.
    Tennessee- Old beater Ford Pickup. Wow, lot of pickups lately huh?
    Georgia- Orange Dodge Charger. If you don't get this one, you're too young...
    Louisiana- Camo painted Pickup. Doesn't matter what make or model, brought to you by Red Jacket and Duck Commander.
    Florida- Those old Buick grandpa cars... no, I don't care to "google that."
    Virginia- Blacked out Chevy Suburban with the discrete light kits. For some reason, when I visited my sister during her 3 years living in VA, this was all I saw on the road most of the time... usually in my rear view mirror.
    New York- Yellow Ford Crown Victoria... yes, it's a taxi cab. Ask anyone who is from NYC and they'll tell you, you don't need to own a car in NY.
    Rhode Island- SMART Car. Never been to RI, don't care to go, but I figured that the smallest state should have the smallest car... that makes sense, right?
    "There is no news in the truth, and no truth in the news."
    "The revolution will not be televised... Instead it will be filmed from multiple angles via cell phone cameras, promptly uploaded to YouTube, Tweeted about, and then shared on Facebook, pending a Wi-Fi connection."

  2. #2
    My Fancy Title gnihcraes's Avatar
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    I've driven many miles in State Government vehicles, which is what I thought when reading this thread "State Cars" haha

    Government issue from motorpool:

    Chevy Impala, ok.
    Ford Taurus, wonder which time you turn the key it wouldn't start. (Brokasauras) constant check engine lights. Open the hood, yep, engine is still there, close hood, hit it!
    Toyota Prius, we killed this thing pretty quick driving 100's of miles a day. It's only a city car.
    Dodge Intrepid, transmission was always going out, left us stranded a few times. Very hard to see out of this wedge of a car.
    Dodge Caravans, decent, can haul a lot of crap, overloaded most every time we used it.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by gnihcraes View Post
    I've driven many miles in State Government vehicles, which is what I thought when reading this thread "State Cars" haha

    Government issue from motorpool:

    Chevy Impala, ok.
    Ford Taurus, wonder which time you turn the key it wouldn't start. (Brokasauras) constant check engine lights. Open the hood, yep, engine is still there, close hood, hit it!
    Toyota Prius, we killed this thing pretty quick driving 100's of miles a day. It's only a city car.
    Dodge Intrepid, transmission was always going out, left us stranded a few times. Very hard to see out of this wedge of a car.
    Dodge Caravans, decent, can haul a lot of crap, overloaded most every time we used it.
    God I remember when they gave us the "K" Cars...
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrysler_K_platform

  4. #4
    Loves Paintball ruthabagah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ronin13 View Post
    All this crabby, sad, negative talk lately (understandable), I got an email from a friend of mine who is an amateur comedy writer I'll share to lighten the mood a bit:


    State Cars
    We all are familiar with state birds, state flowers, and such... but I have compiled a list of state cars for some of the states I've either lived in or traveled to...
    Alaska- State Car: The Snowmobile. Yeah I know, technically it's not a car, but dammit it's about the only means of transportation throughout a lot of the year, especially in the villages.
    California- The Prius. You shouldn't be surprised by this, those tree hugging democrats out there love to be enviro-friendly... just like Al Gore!
    Utah- The Jeep Wrangler. I'm not sure if Mormons have a preferred car, but this, thanks to Moab, is pretty popular.
    Nevada- The Cadillac Convertible. Nothing says Nevada like a drop-top Caddy cruising down the Las Vegas strip at 3am!
    Colorado- Tie between Subaru Impreza Outback and Chevy Tahoe. Either or, it must have a ski rack.
    Texas- Lifted Chevy Pickup. Nuff said.
    Oklahoma- Old Chevy Pickup. If you've never been to OK, then you won't understand this.
    Montana- Lifted Dodge Pickup. Seriously, and it doesn't matter the year, or if it's regular or diesel.
    Tennessee- Old beater Ford Pickup. Wow, lot of pickups lately huh?
    Georgia- Orange Dodge Charger. If you don't get this one, you're too young...
    Louisiana- Camo painted Pickup. Doesn't matter what make or model, brought to you by Red Jacket and Duck Commander.
    Florida- Those old Buick grandpa cars... no, I don't care to "google that."
    Virginia- Blacked out Chevy Suburban with the discrete light kits. For some reason, when I visited my sister during her 3 years living in VA, this was all I saw on the road most of the time... usually in my rear view mirror.
    New York- Yellow Ford Crown Victoria... yes, it's a taxi cab. Ask anyone who is from NYC and they'll tell you, you don't need to own a car in NY.
    Rhode Island- SMART Car. Never been to RI, don't care to go, but I figured that the smallest state should have the smallest car... that makes sense, right?
    For CO, I would agree with the Subaru, but I would replace the Tahoe for the 4runner. 80% of all the 4runner build by Toyota are sold in the US. Half of them here in Colorado.
    "The French soldiers are grand. They are grand. There is no other word to express it."
    - Arthur Conan Doyle, A visit to three fronts (1916)

  5. #5
    Newbie, or Trading Post Troll DrkZide's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ruthabagah View Post
    For CO, I would agree with the Subaru, but I would replace the Tahoe for the 4runner. 80% of all the 4runner build by Toyota are sold in the US. Half of them here in Colorado.
    Which actually surprises me. 4Runners are dog shit slow trying to make it through Eisenhower Pass.

  6. #6
    Paper Hunter
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrkZide View Post
    Which actually surprises me. 4Runners are dog shit slow trying to make it through Eisenhower Pass.
    Probably not the 4runners fault

  7. #7
    BADGE BUNNY Monky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrkZide View Post
    Which actually surprises me. 4Runners are dog shit slow trying to make it through Eisenhower Pass.
    Quote Originally Posted by Flatline View Post
    Probably not the 4runners fault
    More than likely the idiot driving that doesn't know they shouldn't be in 5th (+) gear going up the passes. No one said they were smart for buying a 4runner.. but they are not slow

  8. #8
    BADGE BUNNY Monky's Avatar
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    PS - I didn't chuckle at all. Good thing your friend is an amateur comedy writer.

  9. #9
    I blame everything on Tummy Aches
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    ^^ that made me laugh more than the op. sorry ronin

  10. #10
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    In Alaska they call them Snow Machines

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