Bailey Guns
07-17-2011, 08:59
I recommend spending your kid's college fund money on fun stuff...guns, boats, drugs, fast cars, Harleys...anything but education. Here's why:
Education leads to learning how to do stuff, like writing.
When one learns to write one requires instruments, like pens, with which to write.
Education sometimes leads people to acquire certain niceties...like a washing machine.
With education and employment you become, at least somewhat, attractive as a mate to women.
Women like to do things like quilting. Spending hours upon hours of their time painstakingly and lovingly cutting up and sewing back together little pieces of fabric. They put their entire souls into their craft.
Quilts require washing, in the washing machine, when finished.
Sometimes, men being men, they leave their pens, acquired directly as a result of education and learning how to communicate through the written word, in a pocket.
Then they put the garment concealing the pen into the washing machine.
The pen explodes and leaves ink residue in the washer. Liquid ink residue. It lies dormant, patiently waiting to be called upon to wreak destruction on the next item, innocently and unsuspectingly, placed in the washer by the wife.
An item which happens to be a handcrafted quilt. Made by your wife.
Few things sound like the shrieks of a woman staring at a bright-blue-ink stained, hand-crafted quilt. You'll know it when you hear it...even if you've never heard it before. And if you don't recognize it by the sound, you'll recognize the head spinning round on the shoulders. It's a frightening audible and visual experience not unlike watching Linda Blair in The Exorcist.
All this leads to the requirement of an entirely different class of professional worker.
Divorce lawyers. Oh...and paramedics. (Just kidding...I don't really need a divorce lawyer)
So, I'd advise you to drop out of school and avoid education at all costs. It only leads to trouble.
And use a pencil if you have to write.
Education leads to learning how to do stuff, like writing.
When one learns to write one requires instruments, like pens, with which to write.
Education sometimes leads people to acquire certain niceties...like a washing machine.
With education and employment you become, at least somewhat, attractive as a mate to women.
Women like to do things like quilting. Spending hours upon hours of their time painstakingly and lovingly cutting up and sewing back together little pieces of fabric. They put their entire souls into their craft.
Quilts require washing, in the washing machine, when finished.
Sometimes, men being men, they leave their pens, acquired directly as a result of education and learning how to communicate through the written word, in a pocket.
Then they put the garment concealing the pen into the washing machine.
The pen explodes and leaves ink residue in the washer. Liquid ink residue. It lies dormant, patiently waiting to be called upon to wreak destruction on the next item, innocently and unsuspectingly, placed in the washer by the wife.
An item which happens to be a handcrafted quilt. Made by your wife.
Few things sound like the shrieks of a woman staring at a bright-blue-ink stained, hand-crafted quilt. You'll know it when you hear it...even if you've never heard it before. And if you don't recognize it by the sound, you'll recognize the head spinning round on the shoulders. It's a frightening audible and visual experience not unlike watching Linda Blair in The Exorcist.
All this leads to the requirement of an entirely different class of professional worker.
Divorce lawyers. Oh...and paramedics. (Just kidding...I don't really need a divorce lawyer)
So, I'd advise you to drop out of school and avoid education at all costs. It only leads to trouble.
And use a pencil if you have to write.