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This and teachers too!Originally Posted by Graves
When I was in school the teacher hit you and then the principal smacked you and then your Mom spanked you and the only thing you were REALLY worried about was when you Dad got home!
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If she was injured or not is not the issue. He was in a rage which is not the time to discipline a child. Repeatedly hitting a child while cursing and making statements like "I'll hit you in the face" then leaving to get another belt and coming back "I didn't finish getting my licks, I want my licks" etc is not discipline.
I agree with this statement but we probably have a totally different opinion on who is programmed and who is educated.
Programming is predictable. I rest my case.
+100. There is a fine line between discipline and abuse. This was not discipline. I'm all for "beating" a child and wish more parents would discipline strongly (ie. "spare the rod..."), BUT NOT when it comes from a place of anger and leads to abuse.
What case? You have made none.
I hate to presume but I'd be willing bet you were "educated" in a similar manner to what was in the video. If that is the case I am sorry for you.
Two post from another forum hit the nail on the head in this case.
For all the folks who believe it's appropriate to whip their kid (I'm not talking about a swat on the butt for kids who are too young to reason with and for behavior which is dangerous to them):
Have you ever been in charge of others kids? How did you get them to behave since you couldn't bully them and beat them into submission?
I was den leader for 5 years over 8 boys, a couple of which were "spirited" (read, poorly parented/had some add or whatever the term of the day is). I got those boys to behave because they wanted to and because they respected me and didn't want to disappoint me. It's not rocket surgery but it does take some intelligence, patience and techniques.
Spanking a kid who is old enough to reason and who has wants and desires is very counter productive to true discipline and the desired good behavior. Like I said before, you can get submission, but you won't get the desire to do what's right for the sake of it being right. Along with submission, you'll get resentment, lack of respect, sneaking around, lack of communication etc etc.
I'm sure there are some who are familiar with "outward bound" type programs. They take troubled youths and try to turn them around. Some of the kids are really messed up. They have a high success rate. They don't beat the kids and these are not your run of the mill brats, these are seriously troubled/damaged kids. Give that some thought.I have two sons (13 and 10) and I challenge anyone to find kid that is more well behaved and respectful than either one of them. I have never laid a hand on them, ever, never had too. They respect me but do not fear me, there is a huge difference.For all of you who find no real wrong in the video or believe that it is EVER ok or beneficial to treat a child like that, I'll say this:
You don't realize it because you're living it but you have some mental issues. They could have come from your own abuse as a child or some other trauma. A person who is sick usually doesn't realize that they are so they need an outside source to tell them.
I'm telling you. If you don't see that it's wrong to beat a child in the manner the video showed, you REALLY need to get some professional help before you pass your sick, perverse, twisted way of viewing the world and parenting onto your children.
What is in the video is NOT a healthy or beneficial way to raise a kid. Just because YOU were beaten doesn't mean it's OK or right.
I know this is just the internet and nothing is serious... However, there are real people on the other side of the screen and they effect other people in their lives. From what I've read in this thread, there are some very damaged individuals here. I sincerely hope that you, who need it, will get the help you need so as to not pass this on to your kids.
I've seen the type of adult this behavior makes. Sure they can be nice, productive, kind people but they have deep and painful scars that never go away.
This.
And the Mom yelling "take it like a grown woman!" is retarded and shows their ignorance. Grown adults don't lay down and take a beating.
"That's why I didn't want to bring a computer in the house" he says...in 2004...yeah, that's a comment from a sane person if I ever heard one. Computers are evil don't you know?
The Dad in the video was in a rage...that was no controlled disciplinary action. That was no spank or belt slap on the rear to teach a lesson...that was pure and simple whipping. I'm sure most of you would call it animal abuse if you saw some guy whipping a dog repeatedly like that in his yard...
I'm glad to see I'm not the only one that isn't bothered at all by the video.
a buddy of mine was abused as a child. he said his father would sit him on the bed and say don't move or I'll clobber you. then before he left dad would say if you don't clean your room I'll clobber you.
no matter what he did he got clobbered. that's abuse.
when your child disobeys knowing full well the punishment is the belt, then they should get the belt. had she not disobeyed it would never had happened.
I got the belt when I was a young child. as I got older, I would just get a smack in the face. I can recall every instance it happened, and I deserved it every time, and I'd do the same thing in my dad's place today.
kids will push the limit, and if they find they can get away with it they will push some more, until eventually they run the roost and are little bastards. (I've seen kids order their parents around, and the parents obeyed)
you don't have to beat a child, but the child has to learn that you're the boss and when they disobey the threat of punishment is not false or hollow.
the fact that she wouldn't bend over to take her licks shows me that she was probably a brat and a half, deserving every smack.
I'm a big fan of corporal punishment. My brother and I were spanked ofter growing up, but never like this. My dad uses a belt too sometimes. But, my dad was always in control and never wound up for a swing like this guy. Everytime was the same: 3-4 swats that stung then he would make sure my brother and I understood what we did wrong. He always concluded by saying he was no longer mad at us and loved us. He never deviated from this formula.
I really think this crossed a line. I don't see this guy in control of his emotions and I also think 16 years old is too old to spank. If you havn't instilled good character in your kid by this point then you need to find another avenue of discipline. What she did was wrong, but I don't think the punishment fit the crime.
As you said, you got a smack when you were older. Would you have bent over to take a belt when you were 16?
Sorry fella, this is abusive, if she gets that for "illegal downloads" what the hell did she get for a serious infraction? Ridiculous, that punishment does not fit the crime. Spanking is one thing, that went beyond spanking. (however it was pretty common to get much worse in our house growing up) I wouldn't and haven't ever gone that far with my sons, frankly its unnecessary and gets no better results than a controlled calm spank, secondly I save those for serious infractions, thirdly she is 16, much more effective ways of punishing a child that age like privilege revocation (like obviously computer in this case). I don't like it, discipline out of anger invokes the wrong response, and that was wild uncontrolled discipline. Period.
"Those who would trade liberty for safety deserve neither"
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