Is Florida real?

[JohnnyEgo]

I lived in Florida for 17 years before coming out to Colorado. We would have called that 'Tuesday'.
When I was a Florida-based gun store flunky, there was once a lull in range fire that occurred right at the time a customer finished up a conversation with his friend with the line "...And that's why I want to f@#k a manatee."
It's just Florida.

[ChickNorris]

Ahahahahaha

[BushMasterBoy]

Have you ever seen a manatee mate? I saw a lady arrested once by FMP for interfering with their mating.

[Skip]

I lived in Florida for 17 years before coming out to Colorado. We would have called that 'Tuesday'.
When I was a Florida-based gun store flunky, there was once a lull in range fire that occurred right at the time a customer finished up a conversation with his friend with the line "...And that's why I want to f@#k a manatee."
It's just Florida.

This.

[Aloha_Shooter]

Was only a Florida resident for 3 years but I'll take Florida -- even with the resident kooks and Demoncrats of Dade and West Palm Beach Counties -- over California, New Jersey, Maryland, New York, Oregon, Washington, Nevada, Minnesota, Wisconsin ... I think you get the picture.

[Irving]

What is the industry in Florida? If you aren't retired, a real estate agent, or running coke, what can you do for money out there? Are there any large scale industry things like manufacturing?

[JohnnyEgo]

There is a lot of ag in Central Florida. Not just food, but industrial forestry in support of the paper industry. Lots of fast growing scrub pine. North Florida's centered around Jacksonville, which has a heavy shipping industry. The I-4 corridor is all about the rat (Disney). Tampa has, well, strip clubs and Ybor city, I suppose. Big universities anchoring each section. Lots of medical; doctors, device suppliers, etc... We did such a good job of extracting income from tourists that there is no income tax.

Florida's a corrupt place where money makes all the difference. We would probably let you build a small housing community on a foundation of manatee carcasses if you gave the city enough money and agreed to name it after whatever ecology it destroyed, like "Mangrove Village" or "Coral Cove". Weird happens because all the ingredients are there; it's hot, the days are long, you're surrounded by water on 3 sides, everywhere is full of primordial creatures that could eat you and live in your community retention pond, feels like you've reached the dead end of the country everywhere you go. Nearly everyone there was trying to escape someone else, be it the Seminoles, the escaped slaves, the Florida Crackers, the mob, investment bankers trying to hide with the money they stole from their hedge funds, etc. The rich and the poor live in close proximity to one another, with the poor usually having the better built homes, while the rich have giant mansions made of paper mache and styrofoam. Rich and poor alike know that many of the cops are corrupt, so they just don't get called in until after the guy trying to rob you with the alligator gets shot by the old guy who's mad you tried to park in the handicap space and is coming for you next.

Stay there long enough, and the weird just becomes a part of you, like the crab grass perpetually destroying your yard. And I say this all with love, because I truly loved the place and would not have left it for most places other than Colorado of a decade ago.

[Irving]

I forgot about the paper industry. I heard a lot about the local mill when I was down there for the hurricane. Florida is a unique place for sure.

[JohnnyEgo]

What is sad is that I am pretty sure this is an April Fools article, but because Florida is Florida, something both real and weirder will happen tomorrow.

[TFOGGER]

https://www.foxnews.com/us/florida-m...jouySQOJRwJRhY

A former college student accused of fatally attacking a husband and wife in their Florida home and gnawing on the man's face believed he was “half-dog, half-man,” a forensic psychologist said in a mental health report.

Austin Harrouff, 22, has been charged with killing John Stevens III, 59, and his wife Michelle Mishcon, 53, at their home in Martin County on Aug. 15, 2016. Investigators said that during the attacks, he bit Stevens' face while making growling sounds. The couple was beaten and stabbed during the bizarre attack in their garage.

"The fact that Mr. Harrouff persisted in biting the male victim in the presence of police officers, in spite of being shot, being tased and receiving multiple kicks to the head, suggests that Mr. Harrouff was actively psychotic," Dr. Phillip Resnick of the University Hospitals of Cleveland wrote in the report, released this week by the Martin County State Attorney’s Office.

No shit?